Restaurant Madness: What would you do?

[stessier]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYl9nNIoz8o

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attica_Prison_riot

So now I understand the event. Why is Grund invoking it here?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYt24hq5nbM

So....now I understand the event (meaning, the riot). Why is Grund invoking it here?

This makes sense to you guys? Who's supposed to be Pacino and who are the police in this case?

I also am failing to see CPF's craziness, especially since we haven't heard what happened yet. I mean, you think his reading of what happened is insane?

I feel completely lost in this thread. I'm still in Kansas, or not?

Scroll up two posts.

[GreenGoo]

It's amazing how many people take a story at face value.

People normally only take critical stories at face value. It's the positive ones that tend to get the most skepticism.

[GreenGoo]

Scroll up two posts.

Unless that explains why Grund invoked Attica 2 pages ago, you're not helping. Not to mention I was addressing a post that was written before CPF's explanation. Which I'm looking forward to reading, shortly.

[GreenGoo]

Meh. Although it's more than I've done, but usually from the other side of this story. At least I think so. I don't count the stories that involve forcibly ejecting patrons. That's a whole different chapter in the customer service manual.

Since you're trying to improve, my impression is that your response was a little over the top.

[triggercut]

It isn't what you did that particularly disgusts me. That's bad enough.

For one thing, I take none of this story at face value. I can absolutely see a situation where what actually happened is that something like the seating thing happened, and then you had a negative communication with this lady and left and the rest is just your own fantasy re-imagining of the encounter.

But let's say that your actions (not the woman's) actions did happen as described. What isn't disgusting is that you did what you did. People suffering from manic behavior patterns act out. What's disgusting is that, given time and reflection instead of feel a normal human reaction like shame, you're instead feeling pride at your actions, enough to both post it hear and then tag your denouement with a big, fat, smiley face.

[Chesspieceface]

But let's say that your actions (not the woman's) actions did happen as described. What isn't disgusting is that you did what you did. People suffering from manic behavior patterns act out. What's disgusting is that, given time and reflection instead of feel a normal human reaction like shame, you're instead feeling pride at your actions, enough to both post it hear and then tag your denouement with a big, fat, smiley face.

You know what's disgusting about you? That I've said repeatedly above that I am embarrassed by my behavior, that it is wrong, and that I need to not be like this and you ignore all of that to get your rocks off hating. The smiley face was for the end of the suspense. And I posted here to see if anyone else would never go back, not to brag about the crazy fucking shit I do for no good reason. But you clearly don't care for me, and care very much for restaurant workers.

[triggercut]

But let's say that your actions (not the woman's) actions did happen as described. What isn't disgusting is that you did what you did. People suffering from manic behavior patterns act out. What's disgusting is that, given time and reflection instead of feel a normal human reaction like shame, you're instead feeling pride at your actions, enough to both post it hear and then tag your denouement with a big, fat, smiley face.

You know what's disgusting about you? That I've said repeatedly above that I am embarrassed by my behavior, that it is wrong, and that I need to not be like this and you ignore all of that to get your rocks off hating. The smiley face was for the end of the suspense. And I posted here to see if anyone else would never go back, not to brag about the crazy fucking shit I do for no good reason. But you clearly don't care for me, and care very much for restaurant workers.

I do not think your stated motive for posting this thread is your actual motive for posting it, nor do I think your first post or reveal conveys anything approaching shame here.

Perhaps I am wrong.

[pr0ner]

Negative, Ghost Rider; the pattern is full.

[Chesspieceface]

I do not think your stated motive for posting this thread is your actual motive for posting it, nor do I think your first post or reveal conveys anything approaching shame here.

Perhaps I am wrong.

Heh. That's charitable. I think you've read Quinn, and probably a good amount of pop psychology... you don't get to decide how I express my feelings. The way I convey embarrassment may not map to the way that you receive embarrassment. I have no idea why you are so suspicious of me... I've taken a ton of abuse over the years and I'm still here posting in good faith and to the best of my ability to participate, which is admittedly poor at best.

My reason for posting this was to help myself understand if the thing that made me angry would make other "more reasonable" people angry also, and see how a normal person acts. I used my crazy reaction as a payoff for people to participate because of my posting history and because I knew what would happen if I finished the story in the first post. And I did that on one hand specifically because of YOU, TRIGGERCUT. Because of your history of being so defensive of food service workers and how customers treat them.

So cut a guy a break.

[Lassr]

My reason for posting this was to help myself understand if the thing that made me angry would make other "more reasonable" people angry also, and see how a normal person acts.

If that is the case then Yes, you did over react. I would have either eaten and never gone back if I could never get a satisfactory response from her. If it was really bad I would have just left without eating and went somewhere where they appreciated by patronage. It takes A LOT for me to be confrontational.

[Chesspieceface]

Yes, you did over react. I would have either eaten and never gone back if I could never get a satisfactory response from her. If it was really bad I would have just left without eating and went somewhere where they appreciated by patronage. It takes A LOT for me to be confrontational.

Well yeah... I definitely over reacted... I knew that by the time I got to the car and started apologizing to my girl. But some of the other, perhaps more confrontational, posters have said they would have stood up and left... so I guess I'm not the only one who would take this as subpar treatment either.

Thanks to everyone who answered.

[The Meal]

My reason for posting this was to help myself understand if the thing that made me angry would make other "more reasonable" people angry also, and see how a normal person acts.

You can likely bin my response in with your first bucket, but not so much into the second.

[Chesspieceface]

As something of a tangent... if my reasons for posting really boiled down to being a trolling internet attention whore, wouldn't I go somewhere more active and where I wasn't known so well already? QT3, SA, RPS, GWJ? I post here because I know who is likely to read it and respond, I respect those people from years of reading and writing, and I like it here. I like most of you more than you like me, that's for certain.

[Grundbegriff]

Well yeah... I definitely over reacted... I knew that by the time I got to the car and started apologizing to my girl.

If you're sincere in saying that you regret your actions, you'll go back to the restaurant and

(a) apologize to the woman in question (without reviving your complaint), and
(b) offer to replace her stained shoes

If you're unable to perform those two deeds, then it's legitimate to wonder whether you're sincerely sorry for your misdeed.

[Jaymann]

But was the coffee scalding hot?

[Chesspieceface]

Well yeah... I definitely over reacted... I knew that by the time I got to the car and started apologizing to my girl.

If you're sincere in saying that you regret your actions, you'll go back to the restaurant and

(a) apologize to the woman in question (without reviving your complaint), and
(b) offer to replace her stained shoes

If you're unable to perform those two deeds, then it's legitimate to wonder whether you're sincerely sorry for your misdeed.

Let's be clear. I should not behave this way, ever. It does far more harm to me than to anyone around me, and its not healthy.

That woman is a complete bitch, my girlfriend agreed though she was not happy with my behavior. My reason for hating her was specifically that in every response her attitude was that people can just take her shit or leave... which is the opposite of service (Which is the thing I liked this place for). I think that people like that benefit from knowing that even if they don't think that they are rude, when other people do they should listen because there may be consequences. I certainly had to learn that lesson the hard way.

I'm not looking to repent my sin. I do still feel that there is some logic/justice in what happened. But I also know that it was a childish way to deal with anything, that it wrecked me emotionally for the rest of the day, and that it strained my girlfriend. Not to mention that I could have been detained if a police officer had seen me.

So I am embarrassed. I'm embarrassed that at my age I still behave this way and that despite knowing better I can't stop myself when I get crazed. I'm embarrassed that I frequent that neighborhood and I will have to live up to those actions to anyone who saw me. And I'm embarrassed that as far as I've come in my therapy, this shit still happens fairly often and that is going to probably prevent me from ever being able to have any success that I don't ultimately ruin.

But fuck her coming and going, and her shoes were black anyway.

[Grundbegriff]

If you're sincere in saying that you regret your actions, you'll go back to the restaurant and

(a) apologize to the woman in question (without reviving your complaint), and
(b) offer to replace her stained shoes

...That woman is a complete bitch.... I do still feel that there is some logic/justice in what happened.

I guess triggercut's closer to correct than I had thought. It's not about your attempt to gauge a normal response. It's about you letting it be known that you're a coffee-splashin', mug-smashin' diner badass who put that overworked, stressed out middle-class laborer in her place!

But I also know that it was a childish way to deal with anything, that it wrecked me emotionally for the rest of the day, and that it strained my girlfriend. Not to mention that I could have been detained if a police officer had seen me.

Given that it was probably an actionable deed, how do you suppose it made your victim feel? I see a lot of introspection, and a lot of girlfriend-definition, but very little empathy.

Do you know what the woman's life is like? Do you know what she's going through generally, or how her day had been, or how many times she had dealt with insufferable creeps that day, or what else was going wrong in the establishment, or whether there had been a death in her family? Do you care?

So I am embarrassed. I'm embarrassed that at my age I still behave this way and that despite knowing better I can't stop myself when I get crazed.

Your deed was wrong or it was not wrong. If it was not wrong, then why feel embarrassed? And if it was wrong, then why wouldn't you want to do whatever you can to make up for it with an apology and restitution?

I'm embarrassed that I frequent that neighborhood and I will have to live up to those actions to anyone who saw me.

If you don't apologize to the person you offended, then you're not living up to those actions, are you? And if you're living up to them not to her, but to others to whom you tell the tale, or to others who witnessed the misdeed, then what's that? Just you being a mock-humble, attention-craving raconteur hawking tales of your diner badassery.

But fuck her coming and going, and her shoes were black anyway.

So you're saying you should've poured the whole pot and smashed two mugs? Or maybe two pots and three mugs? If not, why not? If 2 and 3 is unacceptable, then why do you let yourself off the hook over 1 and 1?

[JSHAW]

If I was the woman I'd be calling up Jackie Chiles, he specializes in coffee cases.

[gameoverman]

I understand that some people believe the customer is always right but...

I let my girl amble ahead and by the time we get there she is doing something else and hands us menus and points. Now we both think she is putting us at the least convenient possible table for someone in her position.

It ALL started from this- you both think something, but you don't know. And it turns out what you thought was in fact wrong. It's all on you, I don't see how she can be blamed for what followed. You put her in the position of having to eat the blame for your problems, which might work with a waiter/waitress, but with the owner? I don't thnk so.

Making a mess is pretty embarrassing, since that's what kids do. I wish I had been there though, I would have got a pretty good cellphone video to put up on Youtube out of it.

[Isgrimnur]

Unless that explains why Grund invoked Attica 2 pages ago, you're not helping. Not to mention I was addressing a post that was written before CPF's explanation. Which I'm looking forward to reading, shortly.

My take is that Pacino represents CPF, someone that is in the wrong, that panders to the crowd in order to get support for them against their enemies, a rabble-rouser if you will.

I make no judgment as to the truth of my analysis on my part or any editorial statement as to my thoughts on that interpretation.

[Chesspieceface]

@Grund

I have nearly a complete lack of empathy for people's feelings unless I am intimately involved with them. Its not by choice, but its true. I feel that this woman also showed a complete lack of empathy to my girlfriend's special needs that day, and to the fact that I as a customer felt she was rude to us right before she prepared to take our money.

This is not some poor wage slave old woman. This was a well dressed, overly assertive 40 something, owner of a very popular cafe, with a ton of makeup, an ice cold stare and a shit attitude. Who clearly can do no wrong herself, or even placate someone.

I also feel that your sense of how things are made right is influenced by your spiritual beliefs which differ strongly from mine. My responsibility is to myself and those that I care about, and I am barely able to meet that most days.

I asked her for an apology and she refused thinking I would simply do nothing like everyone else... she was abusing her power as the owner knowing that I could not complain about her to anyone. All she had to say was, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to be rude, we're very busy" and act like it was true. Instead she got in my face and told me that her rudeness was non existent, which was additionally rude. She was victimizing the customer without an apology. So in my cosmic checks and balances we're square now.

Even if I thought she deserved an apology from me, I couldn't do it without telling her she sucked ass. This stuff happens so often in my life... I just have to swallow them and avoid places. You can't live like this and clean up the mess... if you did you'd learn not to do it in the first place. I have some very serious issues that are easy to characterize in the way that you have, but I cannot see it your way or I wouldn't be me.

I'm sorry that you and others wish to judge my character and self expression so harshly. I am doing the best that I am able to understand where others are coming from... are you?

[Chesspieceface]

It ALL started from this- you both think something, but you don't know. And it turns out what you thought was in fact wrong. It's all on you, I don't see how she can be blamed for what followed.

You make a fair point, except that normal etiquette in all cases for seating someone is to stand by the table until the customer "gets seated" to avoid any confusion and act as if you are a decent host.

[GreenGoo]

Unless that explains why Grund invoked Attica 2 pages ago, you're not helping. Not to mention I was addressing a post that was written before CPF's explanation. Which I'm looking forward to reading, shortly.

My take is that Pacino represents CPF, someone that is in the wrong, that panders to the crowd in order to get support for them against their enemies, a rabble-rouser if you will.

I make no judgment as to the truth of my analysis on my part or any editorial statement as to my thoughts on that interpretation.

Yeah, that works....I guess.

I'm not really seeing CPF as garnering support, and the specific reference to Attica is nonsensical (outside of a generic rabble rousing, as you suggest).

Anyway, thanks for the effort.

[Grundbegriff]

I have nearly a complete lack of empathy for people's feelings unless I am intimately involved with them. Its not by choice, but its true.

Ok. Maybe that's something you should consider cultivating and working on.

This is not some poor wage slave old woman. This was a well dressed, overly assertive 40 something, owner of a very popular cafe, with a ton of makeup, an ice cold stare and a shit attitude. Who clearly can do no wrong herself, or even placate someone.

That makes it ok to dump coffee on her shoes and shatter her mug?

I also feel that your sense of how things are made right is influenced by your spiritual beliefs which differ strongly from mine. My responsibility is to myself and those that I care about, and I am barely able to meet that most days.

I believe the whole "take the stolen candy bar back to the general store, apologize to Mr. Wilson, and do a countervailing good deed to set Karma aright" thing is simple intro-level ethics as taught in the common culture. I assure you that my hard line Christian definitions of judgment and mercy would be much more stern and witch-pressing and acerbic.

The question you should ask yourself is why your sense of ethics allows your joint affirmation of the following propositions:
(a) I have done X.
(b) X resulted in material damage Y.
(c) X resulted in social damage Z.
(d) I believe that I should not have done X.
(e) It is not the case that I should offset material damage Y.
(f) It is not the case that I should offset social damage Z.

This seems to be a summary of your opinion. But it's hard to see how affirmation of (e) and (f) can be made logically and doxastically consistent with (d). The truth of (d) seems to entail a negation, not an affirmation, of (e) and (f). If it does not so entail, then what are we to make of "believe" and "should"?

Instead she got in my face and told me that her rudeness was non existent, which was additionally rude. She was victimizing the customer without an apology.

Irrelevant. Her being vocally and situationally rude warranted your being rude vocally and situationally. You don't get to double-dip and say that her being rude also warranted (1) your dumping coffee, nor that it warranted (2) aiming such coffee at her shoes, nor that it warranted (3) your breaking her mug.

Since her rudeness (brusque tone, non-preferential seating) was offset by your verbal scene and physical intimidation of her, what exactly is the basis for (1), (2), and (3)? If they have no basis, how is it that you can believe you shouldn't have done them but not believe that you should apologize and make restitution?

So in my cosmic checks and balances we're square now.

Weak at math as well as logic?

Even if I thought she deserved an apology from me, I couldn't do it without telling her...

With respect, your underlying problem seems to be solipsism; you don't believe in the independent, equally meritorious actuality of others. You treated her as if she were a minor fictional character in your life understood as a film by and about you. Don't be surprised when things don't break your way.

This stuff happens so often in my life...

QED

I have some very serious issues that are easy to characterize in the way that you have, but I cannot see it your way or I wouldn't be me.

Why not suppose that it's your inability or unwillingness to see things differently that prevents you from being you? I'm not saying that "I gotta be me" is just excuse-making; but I am saying it's a pretty irrational way to identify and change the states and behaviors that impede you.

I'm sorry that you and others wish to judge my character and self expression so harshly.

This isn't harsh; as I noted, it's kindergarten-level ethics of the sort one would find on episodes of Little House on the Prairie or Dennis the Menace. It's the stuff that most people take for granted as obvious in the rudimentary expression of pluralistic morality.

I am doing the best that I am able to understand where others are coming from... are you?

Yes. I'm rockin' it. BTW, did you do your best to understand where the woman you assaulted was coming from?

[Kraken]

This makes sense to you guys?

I don't get it either, FWIW.

The Incident is revealed at last. Although it's more offensive than what most of us would do, it does not live up to its marketing. 4/8 tentacles.

If the lady is the owner (which we never established, right?), she is hoping that you will never come back. So everybody wins.

[Jolor]

I am relieved that "put a cap in her sorry ass" was not an outcome.

[Chesspieceface]

Grundbegriff... Do you understand what a personality disorder is? Knowing I have one, and understanding its effects, do not help me not be this way. You are correct, other people are mostly minor fictional characters in my world. This is how my brain works... I have been in therapy since I was 12 and just a couple of years ago at 35 I realized that acceptance is the only option. This is, in fact, in a medical sense, my personality. I cannot stop it or change it, I can just be aware of it and be responsible for it.

In response to your moral equation... I feel I should not behave that way because it hurts me. I feel a person who treats paying customers that way in their own business is going to occasionally get reminded that even though the employees can't tell them they suck, they really do. And in the cafe business, what's some spilled coffee and a broken mug? I should not have done it, but her acting in a way that prevented me from getting food anytime soon, and made the whole endeavor to get to her restaurant specifically for a pleasant place, and parking and walking with a handicapped person (only to realize I'd never eat there again) a waste, damaged my day so I decided that she should incur some damage as well.

So I do not feel that what I did was wrong in your "basic" moral sense or any other ethical sense. I feel that it was wrong for me to do, for my own spiritual well being and the peacefulness of my life. And this is why I think we have something of a religious difference here.

For someone so tolerant and understanding, you have some very specific limits to what you are willing to understand.

Ed: I'd also appreciate it if you wouldn't condescend to me as if I am trying to pull a fast one on you. I'm writing in all sincerity and if that's impossible for you to believe you are more than welcome to pretend I don't exist like all those popehat people do. I am open to what there is for me to learn here, but you seem unable or unwilling to accept that not everyone's mind works like yours.

[Chesspieceface]

This makes sense to you guys?

I don't get it either, FWIW.

The Incident is revealed at last. Although it's more offensive than what most of us would do, it does not live up to its marketing. 4/8 tentacles.

If the lady is the owner (which we never established, right?), she is hoping that you will never come back. So everybody wins.

I knew you'd understand!

(the server we ordered from told me that she was the owner)

[Grundbegriff]

...other people are mostly minor fictional characters in my world. This is how my brain works...
...
...you are more than welcome to pretend I don't exist like all those popehat people do.

That must be it. I've been sullied by the popehatters.

I am open to what there is for me to learn here

You seem closed to what I'm saying. That is fine with me. But don't pretend it's a religious difference; it's a question of how -- from within your own frame of reference -- you can make any sense of verbiage such as "wrong for me to do, for my own spiritual well being and the peacefulness of my life" while harboring the inconsistencies I noted. It goes deeper (again, from your perspective, not mine). But hey-- diner thread in gaming forum.

but you seem unable or unwilling to accept that not everyone's mind works like yours.

I noted that in childhood. It's certainly no stumbling block here, then.

Again: I'm not trying to impose a model on you; I'm trying to point out what your own model imposes on you.

[Chesspieceface]

I'm not closed to what you are saying Grund. I understand and in a sense it is true that these behaviors do prevent me from being me. But to another extent those behaviors ARE me. The problem I have is that I didn't come here for guidance on that topic, and your guidance presupposes some knowledge of what my actual understanding of my behavior is. You speak to me as if I can simply not be this way, and that completely minimizes the extent of my mental illness or the progress that I've made. I'm sure you know that most people this keyed up can't even be honest about it with themselves let alone the public.

I honestly resent your black and white "If you are really sorry you'll do as I say" school-marm/priest routine. My repentance is personal. I meant to fuck up her day and I did. My learning not to act that way wouldn't make her deserve it any less. This whole culture runs on people fucking each other over silently at every opportunity and I can't stand it.

I came here for what I said I came here for, I got it, I did as promised and thanked everyone... and you and triggercut want to give me counseling about what truly motivates me? Neither of you even likes me... how can you possibly understand me?

Edit: And if you'd like to continue this can we please speak at about a tenth grade reading level? Here I'll start:

I get that you think you are saying something helpful, but the dickish, presupposing, condescending manner in which you go about it, makes it way less helpful.

[Grundbegriff]

Can't please all of the people all of the time.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chlawa5Xkac#t=1m0s

[stessier]

I honestly resent your black and white "If you are really sorry you'll do as I say" school-marm/priest routine. My repentance is personal. I meant to fuck up her day and I did. My learning not to act that way wouldn't make her deserve it any less. This whole culture runs on people fucking each other over silently at every opportunity and I can't stand it.

I'm very sorry for the world you live in. I hope someday you realize you don't have to live there and indeed most people don't.

[Trent Steel]

This whole culture runs on people fucking each other over silently at every opportunity and I can't stand it.

Then why continue the cycle?

[Madmarcus]

I' The problem I have is that I didn't come here for guidance on that topic, and your guidance presupposes some knowledge of what my actual understanding of my behavior is. You speak to me as if I can simply not be this way, and that completely minimizes the extent of my mental illness or the progress that I've made.

I came here for what I said I came here for, I got it, I did as promised and thanked everyone... and you and triggercut want to give me counseling about what truly motivates me?

This is going to sound dickish I guess but you should realize that posting was going to make people give you guidance. Perhaps there is some past history in some of the responses you have received but most of it comes across to me as fairly straightforward conversation at the same level as other conversation at work, at church, or in the neighborhood between people (guys) who know each other.

BTW I'm strongly in the overreaction camp but then again I don't feel that what you presented as her actions was that amazingly rude. Clearly I didn't get to hear her tone of voice but my reading of the original post put the blame equally on both you and her. Neither one of you was willing to give the other any slack. You childishly over reacted by taking it to a physical level when you left but you know that so just file it under the Things You Regret tab in your brain and move on. You can't really go back and apologize now without seeming like a bigger dick.

[Z-Corn]

Sounds to me like it wasn't decaf in that cup you smashed...

[Skinypupy]

I always give people the benefit of the doubt when I think they're acting like an asshole, simply because you never know their story. Maybe this woman just got a call that a loved one is in the hospital. Or she just got served divorce papers. Or her cat got hit by a bus. Whatever...there are a million factors that could have lead to her being rude (whether or not she was even rude is wholly debatable, given the details we have) at that particular moment and you don't know any of them. To physically lash out at her and engage in an attitude of "I'm going to fuck up her day" strikes me as incredibly childish and is an extreme overreaction to the situation.

The fact you seem to a) take pleasure in it and b) pawn off physical violence as "I can't help it, I have a condition" is more than a bit disturbing as well.

[Smoove_B]

When the "asshole behavior" has come up in the past here (I'll refer to it from now on as Factor X) I've mentioned that one of my best friends has this trait and it's something that's been a part of him since childhood. Now I know my sample size is unrealistically small (SEE: 1), however I've always believed his personality was a function of his lifestyle. Specifically, his Factor X always seemed to be related to what I perceived was a sense of entitlement. More specifically he grew up never actually wanting anything and at no point did he ever really need to work (even through college) to get anything he wanted. I wouldn't say he was independently wealthy, but money was never an issue. I've personally seen him destroy electronics in anger without regard to how much they cost to own or replace. Maybe it comes down to there never being any consequences; as a child when a tantrum would result in [Broken Toy], Mom would buy a new one. As an adult when tantrum would result in [Broken Gadget], he'd buy it himself.

Maybe I'm focusing on the money issue so much since you specifically mentioned in your rant how much you spent there. To the best of my knowledge my friend has never been diagnosed with a personality disorder, but I guess it's certainly possible.

[Isgrimnur]

[quote="Skinypupy"Maybe this woman just got a call that a loved one is in the hospital. Or she just got served divorce papers. Or her cat got hit by a bus. Whatever...there are a million factors that could have lead to her being rude (whether or not she was even rude is wholly debatable, given the details we have) at that particular moment and you don't know any of them. [/quote]

If she's unable to perform her job in a reasonable manner, then she shouldn't be there. I've taken days off when I was unable to handle my job in an appropriate manner. I don't believe in letting people be a wrecking ball toward me because they're having a bad day. We all have them, and yet not all of us resort to taking it out on other people.

I know I've been trapped in a situation a time or two at work where it had an impact on my subordinates and the customers, and once I realized what I was doing, I apologized to them and did the best to make amends. And then I made an effort to not put them through that again.

And I still wish we had a camera crew foloowing CPF around.

[Anonymous Bosch]

I stand by my earlier zugzwang comment, i.e. at worst, you were compelled to move (yourselves to an alternative eatery).

As far as I'm concerned, nothing described in the original post would justify throwing such a puerile temper tantrum (and it's hard to imagine a girlfriend finding such conduct to be anything less than odious).

[Skinypupy]

Maybe this woman just got a call that a loved one is in the hospital. Or she just got served divorce papers. Or her cat got hit by a bus. Whatever...there are a million factors that could have lead to her being rude (whether or not she was even rude is wholly debatable, given the details we have) at that particular moment and you don't know any of them.

If she's unable to perform her job in a reasonable manner, then she shouldn't be there. I've taken days off when I was unable to handle my job in an appropriate manner. I don't believe in letting people be a wrecking ball toward me because they're having a bad day. We all have them, and yet not all of us resort to taking it out on other people.

I know I've been trapped in a situation a time or two at work where it had an impact on my subordinates and the customers, and once I realized what I was doing, I apologized to them and did the best to make amends. And then I made an effort to not put them through that again.

And I still wish we had a camera crew foloowing CPF around.

She was performing her job just fine. CPF decided she was being rude and lashed out as a result.