Today's panelists are SuperHiro and Inside the Actor's Studio Host James Lipton
Today's Letter
Dear SuperHiro and Inside the Actor's Studio Host James Lipton,
I've been with my boyfriend for about 15 years. Up until now it has been a very satisfactory relationship, both emotionally and sexually. But recently he's been more voracious in bed than normal. I thought this was due to some recent catwoman underwear I bought for sale at Goodwill but I found this not to be the case. I was cleaning out the closet when I discovered a very extensice and advanced hidden camera set, and a series of tapes. My boyfriend has been recording me while having sex! So far it looks like he's keeping it to himself for his own enjoyment. I'm certainly willing to give this a shot, but I wish he didn't keep it a secret. What do I do?
Sincerely,
Jenna Carpenter, age 20
Centerview High School
Chicago, IL
Jenna,
It's always a shock when you find out your long-standing partner has some sexual fetish/hangup. However, I applaud you for taking it in stride. Usually people will go completely nuts and destroy everything, and the significant other comes to find his/her stuff lying in the yard and the person banging the plumber just to get back at them. Or they may take the camera equipment, set it up in the bathroom, catch you masturbating in the shower like a monkey, and post said video on the internet. In this case I would definitely say a cautious confrontation is in order. For all you know, your boyfriend may not be getting off on the actual videos, but the fact that you don't know. Either way, in the case that you break up make damn sure all that video stuff is gone. And by gone I mean cooked over a flame, digested, shit out, and fed to the dog.
-SH
That's it for this episode, tune in next week for more of your relationship and PC game questioned by SuperHiro and his weekly guest columnist!
Dearest Jenna,
I see that your boyfriend has decided to try his hand in the exciting and erotic art form that is amateur pornography. Since you seem to be willing to try it, it will be absolutely fascinating to see the films that you and your boyfriend produce. Maybe you can share it with the fast-growing amateur pornography community!
You may think that I, James Lipton, famous broadway writer/producer, does not know anything about what makes a good amateur pornography flim. Au contraire! Perhaps you've seen some of my more recent works, such as Horny Housewife Sluts take it up the Butt 5, or Down the Sewer Hole 3. Maybe you've seen some of my earlier works as an actor, like Stretched where I played the role of IRS Inspector Dick Largely. Amateur pornography may be considered vulgar to some, but it can truly be a freeing and wonderful erotic experience.
The most important part of any film, esspecially amateur pornography, is the lighting. Obviously the audience must be able to see, or else the whole point of the picture is moot! Many amateur pornography filmmakers insist on lights, but I prefer the warm white glow of natural lighting. Haven't you always wanted to take that day off? Rent a hotel room for a day and open the windows, allowing the natural lights to shine upon you both, and all the important areas. Or, you can use your own room, familiar surrounds can prove to be a wonderful tonic for many nervous first performers.
I assume you will be using stationary cameras. I really must insist that you choose to use a third cameraman instead. It may be quite awkward at first (it sure was for me!), but you'll find that the dynamic angles provided will be more than worth it! And in case you feel like a third, there is one readily available! But if you insist on stationary cameras, use at least two, and make sure you are aware of their positioning. This way you can get the most 'bang' for the buck, pardon the pun.
I wish the greatest of luck to your erotic endeavor, and happy filming!
Sincerely,
James Lipton
