Random randomness

theohall · Post by **theohall** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:46 am

Someone pulled a car into the parking lot at my apartment and torched it a couple of weeks ago.

Kraken · Post by **Kraken** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:55 am

Isgrimnur wrote:
dbt1949 wrote:Why do you get a head ache when your hemorrhoids hurt?
Probably blood pressure related.

Thanks for sharing. Please refrain from doing so in the future.

\

Peppermint schnapps will fix that right up for you.

Jeremy · Post by **Jeremy** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:07 am

Brian wrote:1. Why is it that the same people I get stuck behind doing 30 in a 45 are the same ones who fly by me doing 75 in a 60

Two local stretches of road that I frequent come to mind.

One is flat and straight with no nearby obstructions on either side. The speed limit is 45. Everyone goes 35.

The other is curvy, hilly, and bordered on one side by trees and on the other by a ditch. I see more cops on this road than I do anywhere else but GOD FORBID I adhere to the 35MPH speed without someone climbing up my tailpipe.

RANDOM: There is (was?) a Rutles tribute band named "Ouch!". That's just awesome.

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:21 am

Did you ever notice how much olde people like to talk about bodily fluids and growths and such?

And that some day you too will find all that fascinating?

Sectoid · Post by **Sectoid** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 7:34 am

Hell hath no Furries.

razgon · Post by **razgon** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 7:49 am

I want to believe!!

but, I dont...

Bob · Post by **Bob** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 7:58 am

I don't want to believe!!

but, I do...

Vorret · Post by **Vorret** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 9:05 am

I have the hardest time in the world in any mmorpg, hack n slash, mmorpg to level a guy past 20.

I don't know why but the attraction to starting over just overwhelms me all the time.
I've logged probably over 50 days of Diablo2 and never went over 30.
I've looged god-knows how many hours of WoW and it took me 3 years to reach 60, never went over 62 after 4. Not playing anymore.
I've been subscribed to Anarchy Online since launch, never went over 45 (mind you there's 220 levels!)
Same for Oblivion (even though there's no level), Vanguard, LOTRO, etc...

I just CAN'T.

My name is Vorret and I'm a Altaholic who can't finish what he starts in games.

Semaj · Post by **Semaj** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 9:31 am

If your foundation has a crack in it, do you come from a broken home?

If your in europe and you are driving on the left, are you still on the right side of the road?

I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.

do people who own dogs accept they will eat more dog hair than food 9 times out of ten?

why is it whenever someone says "No offense but..." they think its ok to say the most offensive things?

if someone says: "Not to sound like a.... but..." They always sound exactly liek what they are saying they dont want to sound like?

Is it hereditary to be a cat or a dog person?

Am I the only one waiting for them to remake police academy with an all new cast and have it come out like the police version of American Pie?

Vorret · Post by **Vorret** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 9:49 am

Semaj wrote: Am I the only one waiting for them to remake police academy with an all new cast and have it come out like the police version of American Pie?

No offence but... Yes.

Toe · Post by **Toe** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 11:11 am

On the morning talk show I listen, they were talking about that video of the Domino worker doing all kinds of gross stuff to pizza.

It reminded me of an incidient many years ago in a local bar. Me, my friend, and his girl friend were drinking pitchers of beer. At one point, there was an empty pitcher sitting on the table. My friend was having some sinus issues and in the course of clearing it ended up with a huge, nasty loogey. With no where to really go with it, he spit it into the empty pitcher. A little bit later we get another pitcher of beer. As the girlfriend (who not really paying attention earlier) pours herself a fresh mug, my friend notices floating on top his huge nasty loogey. Naturally it pours off the top and is now in his girlfriends mug, floating on top. He, being the evil bastard he is, decides to not say anything. After the girl finishes off her mug (drained to the last drop) he tells her what had transpired. The poor girl, with a look of horror and disgust on her face, pauses for a few seconds then projectile vomits everywhere.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 11:12 am

Vorret wrote:I have the hardest time in the world in any mmorpg, hack n slash, mmorpg to level a guy past 20.

I don't know why but the attraction to starting over just overwhelms me all the time.
I've logged probably over 50 days of Diablo2 and never went over 30.
I've looged god-knows how many hours of WoW and it took me 3 years to reach 60, never went over 62 after 4. Not playing anymore.
I've been subscribed to Anarchy Online since launch, never went over 45 (mind you there's 220 levels!)
Same for Oblivion (even though there's no level), Vanguard, LOTRO, etc...

I just CAN'T.

My name is Vorret and I'm a Altaholic who can't finish what he starts in games.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 11:50 am

I have two conflicting motivations in life that are always at odds with each other.

The will to be cheap
The will to be lazy

The will to be lazy is generally the stronger of the two forces. But I seem to fail in the mornings before I go to work. Typically, I can grab a dish eat from it and let it lie, leave clothes on the floor, whatever. It all fulfills my will to be lazy rather nicely. But something is broken in the morning, when I am already running late for work, I start doing things to further enhance my tardiness. I find my self doing things like picking up and and cleaning up and taking care of other strange odds and ends when I have absolutley no time to do such things. This strange productivity also doesn't make my life less expensive. And yet when I get home from work or have little to do on the weekends, picking up after myself is too much of a bother.

Something is seriously out of whack.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 11:53 am

I've got the same problem. I believe that it stems from the laziness wanting to override the requirement to actually go to work. The work that you do in the morning is lazier than actually performing your job.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:13 pm

Isgrimnur wrote:I've got the same problem. I believe that it stems from the laziness wanting to override the requirement to actually go to work. The work that you do in the morning is lazier than actually performing your job.

I fear you may be right. Why can't I ever harness that energy when I have nothing else to do?

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:16 pm

I'm bummed that I didn't go out on Easter Monday and buy Easter overstock candy at discounted prices. I love Reese's eggs but I don't generally want to pay full price for them.

Bakhtosh · Post by **Bakhtosh** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 1:48 pm

How does one get into a militia? Is there an online application?

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 3:39 pm

Bakhtosh wrote:How does one get into a militia? Is there an online application?

You just have to know the right red necks. Why wanna join ours?

Bakhtosh · Post by **Bakhtosh** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 5:33 pm

Sure...as long as I don't have to listen to idiots spew about how "the blacks are pawns of the Zionist world government and need to go back to Africa; and that's why we don't answer to no Federal types".

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 5:39 pm

Just buy a gun. You are in a well regulated militia.

Nothing else to it.

Tscott · Post by **Tscott** » Wed Apr 15, 2009 6:25 pm

Vorret wrote:I have the hardest time in the world in any mmorpg, hack n slash, mmorpg to level a guy past 20.

I don't know why but the attraction to starting over just overwhelms me all the time.
I've logged probably over 50 days of Diablo2 and never went over 30.
I've looged god-knows how many hours of WoW and it took me 3 years to reach 60, never went over 62 after 4. Not playing anymore.
I've been subscribed to Anarchy Online since launch, never went over 45 (mind you there's 220 levels!)
Same for Oblivion (even though there's no level), Vanguard, LOTRO, etc...

I just CAN'T.

My name is Vorret and I'm a Altaholic who can't finish what he starts in games.

May I introduce you to Guild Wars? Level 20 is the max level you can reach, and in towns you can constantly change your skills, attribute points and (once you've reached a certain point in the game) even your secondary class.

oh, wait, this is the random thread?...

Sorry, I'll try to be more random in my next rutabaga.

Brian · Post by **Brian** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 8:07 am

Tscott wrote:Sorry, I'll try to be more random in my next rutabaga.

Please do.

Purple monkey dishwasher.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 8:30 am

If purple is the color of royalty
And purple is the color of insanity

Does that mean we should actively seek insane people and make them our leaders?

Tscott · Post by **Tscott** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 9:02 am

Brian wrote:
Tscott wrote:tuna rubber a little blubber in my Igloo
Please do.

Purple monkey dishwasher.

the weasel squeaks faster than a seven day week
I said that Timmy and that purple Monkey are all down at Bobby's house
making themselves pesters and lesters and jesters and, my, traitors of kind

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 10:06 am

Bakhtosh wrote:Sure...as long as I don't have to listen to idiots spew about how "the blacks are pawns of the Zionist world government and need to go back to Africa; and that's why we don't answer to no Federal types".

No, they're just against everything and everybody that isn't them.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 10:15 am

Tscott wrote:
Brian wrote:
Tscott wrote:tuna rubber a little blubber in my Igloo
Please do.

Purple monkey dishwasher.
the weasel squeaks faster than a seven day week
I said that Timmy and that purple Monkey are all down at Bobby's house
making themselves pesters and lesters and jesters and, my, traitors of kind

You'd think I'd be good at word salad speak, which I admire because said speak is often steady foundation for creativity. But I am always stuck on a sort of shallow associative thinking mode that I can't get out of. I'm blown away by writers for talk shows, who can come up with a new schtick every single day. And even more so by someone like Clive Anderson who could intoduce people a billion different meaningless ways off the top of his head. I seem to be missing that part of the brain. It's not just a missing marble, it's that big marble, the, um what's it called, the shooter marble, which by the way always hurt my thumb. I must have never gotten the hang at shooting the them. I can also remember marveling at the complexity of jacks until I learned how to play. Then I just wanted to bounce the ball of the walls. Bounce the ball of the walls was one of my favorite games. That and bounce the ball so high it to get it to land on the highest roof around. The problem was that when you won this game, you lost your ball. There is no taking it and going home. On the other hand if you used marbles of one of those paddles with a string then you'd have no problem taking your ball and going home. I never really got the point of the paddle ball game. As easy as I am to entertain, they never did anything for me. I'd rather try and fail to juggle. Which bums me out. Not failing to juggle, per se, but the fact that we got to see a contact juggler on Saturday. Or we would have, if the stage weren't so low and he didn't spend so much time lieing on the ground and so many tall people weren't in front of us. I am totally into the like of people like Michael Moschen. There's a talen that just mesmerises me like I am chicken being stared at. I wish he'd tour. Moschen, not a chicken. The only way I'd go watch a chicken tour is it was a muppet and was touring with Gonzo. Man I really miss those style of Vaudvillain variety venued veiwings. I loves me some side shows and comedy. I don't understand why there isn't a big resurgence of that stuff. Every time I go to a show like that, no matter how big or how small the word gets out and the shows are packed. There's a sort of creativity involved there where you see stuff you never see and you wonder where someone concieved of an idea to do such a thing. TLDR

Tscott · Post by **Tscott** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 10:22 am

Tscott wrote:

Father, I killed my monkey.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 11:04 am

comma comma pipe comma

Mr Bubbles · Post by **Mr Bubbles** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 11:40 am

I just discovered that my head is not symmetrical and a little pointy. I hope I don't go bald or I'm screwed.

Sectoid · Post by **Sectoid** » Thu Apr 16, 2009 9:55 pm

Mr Bubbles wrote:I just discovered that my head is not symmetrical and a little pointy. I hope I don't go bald or I'm screwed.

Gumby?

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Fri Apr 17, 2009 8:38 am

My mother was a fish

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Sat Apr 18, 2009 2:03 am

LordMortis wrote:My mother was a fish

What is she now?

Tscott · Post by **Tscott** » Sat Apr 18, 2009 2:17 am

Abe Vigoda

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Sat Apr 18, 2009 8:45 am

Is alive and well!

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Mon Apr 20, 2009 10:02 am

I think I might break down and fix my car again. Anyone ever replace front wheel drive half shafts before? Do I need to do them in pairs? How hard is it to rip apart the suspensions around them?

(And yeah I googled it)

$250 for the repair vs $16000 for a new car.
$250 for the repair vs $16000 for a new car.
$250 for the repair vs $16000 for a new car.

I don't know which way to go.

Kelric · Post by **Kelric** » Tue Apr 21, 2009 12:38 am

Why are girls so confusing?

And why does the electoral college still exist?

Sectoid · Post by **Sectoid** » Tue Apr 21, 2009 10:21 am

Kelric wrote:Why are girls so confusing?

And why does the electoral college still exist?

They are not confusing, just evil.

It sucks that you have to graduate electoral high school first.

Bakhtosh · Post by **Bakhtosh** » Tue Apr 21, 2009 2:01 pm

Okay, there are 438 electoral college votes. If we ignore D.C., every state has at least 4 votes. To make the math a bit easier, even the smallest state represents almost 1% of the total number of votes. If we went with a pure popular vote, only 14 out of 50 states would represent more than 1% of the popular vote. 36 states would basically be ignored because even all added together, they couldn't make a dent in the popular vote. Candidates would no longer try to win battlegound states. They'd only have to concentrate on the areas of highest voter concentration. Which is more desireable, spending 10 million dollars to get 50,000 additional votes in Ohio, or spending 5 million to get 150,000 more votes out of New York City area?

edosan · Post by **edosan** » Tue Apr 21, 2009 3:57 pm

Bakhtosh wrote:If we ignore D.C., every state has at least 4 votes.

There are seven states that have three votes. Your Electoral College votes are your total number of senators and congressmen.

razgon · Post by **razgon** » Wed Apr 22, 2009 6:32 am

Someone is shrinking my shirts!!