Buying your first home

[malchior]

EJECT! EJECT!

Why? We literally have them by the balls. It is either foreclosure or sell. He said they have no outs. So in scenario 1 I get the house I want. In scenario 2, they eventually lose their house. Either way the balance is restored. Every answer to them now is no. I told the lawyer we are no longer accommodating any requests to extend, delay or change terms.

Or they could move before the end of the month and he could recover after moving. If you were 50% of the way done on June 7th, does that mean you started the process in early April? Or did you start earlier and are counting on this going into September? Are your kids school aged?

No kids here. Any reference to time included other failed deals (3 of them in fact prior to this). We started looking around the end of March.

They can't move before the surgery because...they probably haven't looked for a place yet. He is likely bullshitting me.

[Zaxxon]

You are assuming that this ends at closing. The closing is the beginning. Owning the home is the real battle. I have 0 faith that this house will work out well for you based on your descriptions of the sellers. A home inspection is nice, but not close to comprehensive. Are you confident that these folks have kept up with preventive maintenance and the like and have been fully forthcoming about any known issues?

Hopefully Spidey Sense is off-base.

[malchior]

You are assuming that this ends at closing. The closing is the beginning. Owning the home is the real battle. I have 0 faith that this house will work out well for you based on your descriptions of the sellers. A home inspection is nice, but not close to comprehensive. Are you confident that these folks have kept up with preventive maintenance and the like and have been fully forthcoming about any known issues?

Hopefully Spidey Sense is off-base.

The home inspector pointed out issues. Nothing really troubling. They could have concealed damage. There is actually a plan for that. We are going to do a comprehensive check of some things after we take possession. My lawyer is the escrow agent and if we time it right will have play to delay payments if we find concealment. It is a gamble but we had someone along with the home inspector who knows houses and he said it was slightly above average for the age. I'll take that.

[Kelric]

Got the purchase and sale agreement from the seller. Need to find a lawyer to look at it. The lender on the home has now gotten to the send someone out to assess it stage. In theory, I could be buying this house (condo).


AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Roman]

Malchior - any updates on this process?

[$iljanus]

Malchior - any updates on this process?

The owners drugged him and sold off his organs. After the payoff they were never seen again...

[malchior]

Malchior - any updates on this process?

The owners drugged him and sold off his organs. After the payoff they were never seen again...

Not too far off. In reality, we are in an unfortunate holding pattern. I forgot where I left off here but I'll cliff note this because it is beyond absurd at this point. Since then it has been clearly explained that we really have no out either. We can't walk away as much as they can't. We have to at least to attempt to close. NJ contracts are pretty iron-clad so we are in the driver's seat but just busting out without mutual consent is not going to happen. Preface aside here is the latest:

So after I last posted with the seller deciding to request an extension to closing (to the end of August) because he had imminent surgery, they then waited six days and sent along an infuriating letter saying that as a "courtesy" they were letting us know in advance that they couldn't meet the closing date (as opposed to just not showing up -- THANKS!). We responded that their problems weren't of our making and that they should at least help us with the rate lock extension and that they have to close by the end of August or be in breach of contract. They have not replied to that letter.

So the end game goes something like this, unless they agree to the rate lock extension we will have to close on our contract date. They will clearly not appear. Then we will send a letter specifying the NJ minimum reasonable time to appear. If they don't appear then this becomes a full out lawsuit, burn them to the ground scenario. We walk away and wait until spring to try this again if ever because I have less than great flexibility with my current apartment. My preference is they come to their senses, sort out their shit and get to the table. I'm not holding my breath.

[malchior]

Another "hilarious" misfortune! My lawyer accidentally copied my former agent into a discussion via email. It was an honest mistake revolving around the former agent and my wife sharing the same first name. I replied to an email about the above drama and realized I didn't reply all cutting out my wife. I then replied all and added a note "(Re-reply with <wife's/former agent's name> on the thread)". He took it literally to mean that he should re-reply with the agent added as a cc forgetting that we were using a different agent. Hurray!

[malchior]

Another day another round of drama. So today they notified us that finally found a rental and the the move-in day is MIRACULOUSLY the day before the one they've been pushing for nearly a month. This will push the closing out even farther and is later than what we will accept. I'm probably going with insisting on the minimum reasonable waiting time (about a week earlier) and unless they put their stuff on a truck and close on that day we are going to declare them in breach. I'm tired of their bullshit.

[Kelric]

Even though nobody asks about me I'll keep posting, damnit!

Had the inspection over the weekend - the guy was fantastic and both my father and my realtor thought he did a good job. Recommended getting some valve off the furnace fixed before winter, said the rot on the corner of the front porch needs to be repaired (which I knew of before making an offer) and that the roof of the garage should be replaced in a year or two. Other than that, everything else was pretty solid. One or two shingles on the roof should get patched up, there are a couple of plugs still on knob and tube, and the oven wasn't heating very quickly (his opinion is clogged ignition ports), but those are all potentially minor. We discovered the entire place had new insulation blown into the walls last winter (fantastic!) and I learned how I should keep my furnace running properly.

I am taking Wednesday off of work to fill out my mortgage applications. I have so many questions I am probably just going to try and make an appointment at the lender and take up some poor fool's entire day.

[PLW]

Just rebought our first home. Refinancing is so much less painful than home buying. I just want to stay in this house forever.

[$iljanus]

Even though nobody asks about me I'll keep posting, damnit!

That's because your story may have some light at the end of the tunnel. And I didn't think the sellers were going to drug you and sell you for organ parts like poor Melchior. Hope it all turns out well for you and Melchior!

[Carpet_pissr]

I recommend introducing aliens (subtly) into the next update on your house buying status...as it is, your process is going way too smoothly for anyone to comment.

If you want feedback, we're going to need to see some drama, tension, perhaps some violence and nudity, dammit!

[Freezer-TPF-]

there are a couple of plugs still on knob and tube, and the oven wasn't heating very quickly (his opinion is clogged ignition ports), but those are all potentially minor. We discovered the entire place had new insulation blown into the walls last winter (fantastic!) and I learned how I should keep my furnace running properly.

I'd look into that further. Knob and tube can be bad news, and my understanding is that insulation over knob and tube is against code.

[Exodor]

Even though nobody asks about me I'll keep posting, damnit!

That's because your story may have some light at the end of the tunnel. And I didn't think the sellers were going to drug you and sell you for organ parts like poor Melchior. Hope it all turns out well for you and Melchior!

I think it's because it's impossible to wrap my head around KELRIC being engaged and buying a home. Aren't you a kid living at home?

Where the hell did the last 10 years go.

[Chaz]

I know, right? Seems like just yesterday I was buying him booze on the sly...

[Carpet_pissr]

Considering "firing" our agent, who has turned out to be a nice guy, but has the initiative of a slug. NOTHING gets done or talked about unless I prompt him with a text or email or call. 3 people come to see our house in a week, it takes me following up with him to follow up with the agents that showed it.

I have tolerated it to date, even though I often question why I am potentially going to pay this guy, and for what.

So one of our friends recently contacted us saying that they are potentially interested in buying our house. They live in a horrible neighborhood, with just awful schools (even for SC), and they want to move closer into the city I guess. Anyhoo, I know they probably can't afford our house, but I had a pretty long conversation with said friend about mortgage rates, monthly payments, PMI, etc.

For some reason, I even mentioned it to my agent, as a side note to yet another follow up email I sent about a house we recently looked at. He comes back to me with (this is a quote):

"As to your friend in West Cola. I will consider buying their house so they can buy your,so you can buy!
When I do this the less expensive theirs the better,and do need to buy right so I can re-sell or worst case,have to rent it.
(Other non relevant stuff)
If you talk to the West Cola people you can let them know what I will consider,thanks, "

W.T.F. I had to compose myself before responding. Dude, if you want to help us out so much so we can buy the house we are looking at, BUY OUR HOUSE. I might be missing something here, but I wonder if he had been drinking when he wrote that (email was sent after 6p on a Friday). Seriously, what the hell is he thinking?

[Sarkus]

Considering "firing" our agent, who has turned out to be a nice guy, but has the initiative of a slug. NOTHING gets done or talked about unless I prompt him with a text or email or call. 3 people come to see our house in a week, it takes me following up with him to follow up with the agents that showed it.

I have tolerated it to date, even though I often question why I am potentially going to pay this guy, and for what.

So one of our friends recently contacted us saying that they are potentially interested in buying our house. They live in a horrible neighborhood, with just awful schools (even for SC), and they want to move closer into the city I guess. Anyhoo, I know they probably can't afford our house, but I had a pretty long conversation with said friend about mortgage rates, monthly payments, PMI, etc.

For some reason, I even mentioned it to my agent, as a side note to yet another follow up email I sent about a house we recently looked at. He comes back to me with (this is a quote):

"As to your friend in West Cola. I will consider buying their house so they can buy your,so you can buy!
When I do this the less expensive theirs the better,and do need to buy right so I can re-sell or worst case,have to rent it.
(Other non relevant stuff)
If you talk to the West Cola people you can let them know what I will consider,thanks, "

W.T.F. I had to compose myself before responding. Dude, if you want to help us out so much so we can buy the house we are looking at, BUY OUR HOUSE. I might be missing something here, but I wonder if he had been drinking when he wrote that (email was sent after 6p on a Friday). Seriously, what the hell is he thinking?

My guess is that he doesn't consider your house (for whatever reason) a good "flip" candidate but does consider your friends to be one. His lack of action on your house suggests he may not be all that excited about somethings related to it in general.

[Carpet_pissr]

Considering "firing" our agent, who has turned out to be a nice guy, but has the initiative of a slug. NOTHING gets done or talked about unless I prompt him with a text or email or call. 3 people come to see our house in a week, it takes me following up with him to follow up with the agents that showed it.

I have tolerated it to date, even though I often question why I am potentially going to pay this guy, and for what.

So one of our friends recently contacted us saying that they are potentially interested in buying our house. They live in a horrible neighborhood, with just awful schools (even for SC), and they want to move closer into the city I guess. Anyhoo, I know they probably can't afford our house, but I had a pretty long conversation with said friend about mortgage rates, monthly payments, PMI, etc.

For some reason, I even mentioned it to my agent, as a side note to yet another follow up email I sent about a house we recently looked at. He comes back to me with (this is a quote):

"As to your friend in West Cola. I will consider buying their house so they can buy your,so you can buy!
When I do this the less expensive theirs the better,and do need to buy right so I can re-sell or worst case,have to rent it.
(Other non relevant stuff)
If you talk to the West Cola people you can let them know what I will consider,thanks, "

W.T.F. I had to compose myself before responding. Dude, if you want to help us out so much so we can buy the house we are looking at, BUY OUR HOUSE. I might be missing something here, but I wonder if he had been drinking when he wrote that (email was sent after 6p on a Friday). Seriously, what the hell is he thinking?

My guess is that he doesn't consider your house (for whatever reason) a good "flip" candidate but does consider your friends to be one. His lack of action on your house suggests he may not be all that excited about somethings related to it in general.

No problem with that, as I tried to think through his reasoning, but he has never even seen the house, knows what the address is, or ANYthing. I gave him no details, other than "some friends of ours mentioned that they are interested in our house, but of course they would have to sell theirs first." That's it. Who writes an email like the one above based on nothing?

Granted, ours IS proving to be more difficult than he thought to sell (three main reasons I think - we priced it too high at the peak of the "buying season", we are on a rather steep hill, and it's tri-level), but damn, what a weird thing to offer sight unseen.

[JSHAW]

Carpetpssr, just having read your last few posts would be enough for me to want to fire that agent.

There HAS to be someone in your area that can do a better job for you than that guy.

If you're the one that has to motivate him to do things for you I hope you've tried to imagine how things are going to get when, or IF you
ever get to the closing on the house? I wouldn't trust the guy to put up a for sale sign in my front yard, much less having him making sure
that the closing paperwork was all in order.

FIND someone more professional.

For him to send that piss poor excuse of an email about buying your friends home so he could help you, DITCH that mofo before he
screws up things for you in the future. He sounds like a real dipshit piece of work.

[Carpet_pissr]

Carpetpssr, just having read your last few posts would be enough for me to want to fire that agent.

There HAS to be someone in your area that can do a better job for you than that guy.

If you're the one that has to motivate him to do things for you I hope you've tried to imagine how things are going to get when, or IF you
ever get to the closing on the house? I wouldn't trust the guy to put up a for sale sign in my front yard, much less having him making sure
that the closing paperwork was all in order.

FIND someone more professional.

For him to send that piss poor excuse of an email about buying your friends home so he could help you, DITCH that mofo before he
screws up things for you in the future. He sounds like a real dipshit piece of work.

Unfortunately I have a contract with him. Need to pull that thing out and read it more carefully I guess.

I just don't understand WHY he would offer to do such a thing?! Gonna have to go with inebriated while texting since he hasn't responded to my admittedly sarcastic, and probably over the top response. Or, you know, that could also be the reason he hasn't responded.

Maybe there is a WTF clause in the contract for such situations, where, if your agent apparently has gone bat shit insane, you can dump him before the contract period is up.

[nasai]

You can agree mutually to dissolve the contract.

[JSHAW]

So if you decide to not sell your house and take it off the market, would that be enough to get you out of your contract with him?

Take it off the market, wait a month or two, then find yourself another broker. Like you said check your contract to see under what
conditions you can get out of the contract.

[nasai]

Typically, a broker can command his portion of the commission up to 6 months following a dissolution of contract. What he said above..... check your contract. There are a few different ways to write them up.

[Carpet_pissr]

So if you decide to not sell your house and take it off the market, would that be enough to get you out of your contract with him?

Take it off the market, wait a month or two, then find yourself another broker. Like you said check your contract to see under what
conditions you can get out of the contract.

That would be a good idea except for timing. School starts Monday, and one of the biggest, if not the biggest draw of our house is the school zone we are in. And based on last year, at least, the post September real estate market around here is SLOW to non-existent.

So I pulled the contract, and it's for a 6 month period, so 3 months remaining more or lese (plus that 6 months addtl rider/clause that was mentioned above)

I think he would agree if I asked him to dissolve in a calm, adult manner (as opposed to my normal sarcastic/joking approach to uncomfortable situations). He's not an asshole, just...incompetent perhaps.

My wife disagrees that we should do this. I already decided not to use another agent that we used for a month or so to look at a few houses, but never signed with her (primarily because I had no confidence in her, she was new to area, and ultimately, didn't respond to several of my emails when we were ready to sell the house). So my wife thinks we should consider that we (read "me") are being difficult, though she agrees with me that current guy is the suck.

Add to that the fact that I was extremely unhappy with the way our agent we used to buy our current house handled the negotiations, and closing, and of course a reasonable person would start to suspect that THEY are the asshat, not the agents. After that first agent experience though, I did not want to go through that again, so I am probably a little extra sensitive on the topic.

Should I offer some kind of token fee for his time spent to date? I wonder how much would be high enough not to come across as an insult. He has done one open house, and showed us maybe...5 different houses so far, so he hasn't spent a WHOLE lot of time with us.

[Carpet_pissr]

Correction: contract expires Dec 27 and has a 90 day clause after that date.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Carpet_pissr]

Man, I have to share this. It's both funny and sad at the same time. Not a peep about his crazy house buying offer. Either my response was too harsh, or he just wants to pretend he never sent it (or both).

Executive summary/background: Now that school has started, I recently told our agent we want to get more aggressive with pricing/selling our house, and having identified a house that we are actually interested in buying, I asked him how best to proceed to be able to feel out whether the sellers will come down to an acceptable price for us (right now, their house is priced way out of the market IMO, and has sat there for almost a year, probably with no one but us even LOOKing at it, it's so ridiculously high) Since we have not sold ours, and really don't have any serious lookers either, there is certainly a timing thing to work out, and I was looking for some advice. He went on for 20 minutes about how to do such a thing, how he could feel out the agent, and get some insight about where they stand, how flexible they are etc.

Here is the email exchange between my agent, and the seller's agent, in direct response to the convo I had with my agent above (start at bottom and read up):
>>>>>>>>>>>>>

From: CP's agent
Date: Tue, 21 Aug 2012 16:38:36 +0000
To: Selling agent of house we want to buy
ReplyTo: CP's agent
Subject: Re: house on briarwood

Thanks John,we will talk,
CP's agent
-------------------
From: selling agent of house we want to buy (John)
Date: Tue, 21 Aug 2012 09:25:03 -0700 (PDT)
To:CP's agent

Hey CP's agent. Sounds like they might entertain the offer if you want to put it on paper. Thanks, John.

---------------

From: CP's agent
To: Selling agent of house we want to buy (John)
Subject:
Sent: Sun, Aug 19, 2012 6:43:22 PM

John,do you think your sellers would like to see an offer?? Tks,
CarpetPisser's agent
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Wow...you just don't normally see that level of...what...professionalism? Finesse? So glad I signed up to pay this dude 6 large for his expertise and skill. Just the way he carefully crafted such a difficult question...seemingly so simplistic, yet...layers and layers of subtlety that escapes those who aren't paying attention. Stating a self-obvious (borderline rhetorical) question, and then the double question marks at the end for emphasis? Brilliant!

[Covenant72]

Not to mention the biz-speak of Tks thrown in at the end. I never would have known to do that.

[Zaxxon]

That is some quality work right there.

[Freezer-TPF-]

I can haz house? Kthx

[Carpet_pissr]

SORRY TO BOTHER, AND I KNOW THIS SOUNDS CRAZY, BUT DO YOU THINK THAT YOUR SELLERS, WHO ARE TRYING TO SELL THEIR HOUSE, WOULD POSSIBLY ENTERTAIN THE IDEA OF SOMEONE MAKING AN OFFER TO BUY THEIR HOUSE THAT THEY ARE TRYING TO SELL? DO YOU THINK THAT IS SOMETHING THAT THEY WOULD BE INTERESTED IN. AT ALL? SORRY TO BOTHER IF NOT!

It's so very Southern. Gah!

Maybe I need to find me a transplanted agent from a large city outside the South to get this shit rolling. I'm quickly tiring of this dude and his laid backism.

[PLW]

SORRY TO BOTHER, AND I KNOW THIS SOUNDS CRAZY, BUT DO YOU THINK THAT YOUR SELLERS, WHO ARE TRYING TO SELL THEIR HOUSE, WOULD POSSIBLY ENTERTAIN THE IDEA OF SOMEONE MAKING AN OFFER TO BUY THEIR HOUSE THAT THEY ARE TRYING TO SELL? DO YOU THINK THAT IS SOMETHING THAT THEY WOULD BE INTERESTED IN. AT ALL? SORRY TO BOTHER IF NOT!

Hey I just emailed you,
and this is crazy.
If you want offer
call me maybe?

Thx,

CP's Agent

[coopasonic]

SORRY TO BOTHER, AND I KNOW THIS SOUNDS CRAZY, BUT DO YOU THINK THAT YOUR SELLERS, WHO ARE TRYING TO SELL THEIR HOUSE, WOULD POSSIBLY ENTERTAIN THE IDEA OF SOMEONE MAKING AN OFFER TO BUY THEIR HOUSE THAT THEY ARE TRYING TO SELL? DO YOU THINK THAT IS SOMETHING THAT THEY WOULD BE INTERESTED IN. AT ALL? SORRY TO BOTHER IF NOT!

Hey I just emailed you,
and this is crazy.
If you want offer
call me maybe?

Thx,

CP's Agent

Both brilliant and disgusting. Bravo!

[malchior]

Quick update of craziness:

I was forced to take a business trip for the beginning of this week and am unfortunately managing this train wreck from afar. (Un)fortunately, I am looking at finally closing on this mess on Friday.

Last week they said they couldn't make agreed repairs due to poverty. They traded us some stuff that I would have bought anyway (pool stuff/patio furniture). The repairs for the most part are little things so no worries. I called one place nearby to price out one of the repairs and it turns out they had a quote due to my seller calling them. So at least I know exactly how much it'll be to do the repair. The contractor told me he was going to do the work but the seller wanted to pay them at closing and he wasn't too comfortable with that. Apparently he knows the guy personally and did not want to go with the arrangement. I said see you in a week (hopefully). The best part is we are talking a little over two hundred dollars. I also got the carpenter ant treatment receipt and that clearly was marked pay at close. Yikes. I'll point out that we know that they have an open HELOC with 25k free. Morons.

Cut to today where the wheels really start coming off the bus: I learned that my lawyer has a family emergency and cannot attend the closing anymore and his partner will fill in. GREAT. Then the sellers asked me to arrange to cut over power on Friday. This was apparently VERY IMPORTANT to them. I mean one more day of power is clearly material.

Anyway, I called the power company...and they couldn't do the transfer of service. Apparently the sellers have a "huge unpaid balance" and we cannot do it over the phone. I couldn't get details but she wasn't sure why there wasn't a disconnect order. Awesome. I then walked through the process with the customer service rep. I need to close and then send over some docs to the utility to cut over. And now they are asking to move closing back 3 hours to allow time for moving.

Almost done. This has been unreal.

[$iljanus]

Anyway, I called the power company...and they couldn't do the transfer of service. Apparently the sellers have a "huge unpaid balance" and we cannot do it over the phone. I couldn't get details but she wasn't sure why there wasn't a disconnect order. Awesome. I then walked through the process with the customer service rep. I need to close and then send over some docs to the utility to cut over. And now they are asking to move closing back 3 hours to allow time for moving.

Almost done. This has been unreal.

I hope at least the key works to your new house. I foresee them frantically dumping stuff into a U-Haul past closing. But I will be happy if I'm wrong.

[Freezer-TPF-]

I can almost guarantee they won't be done moving at closing time.

[malchior]

I can almost guarantee they won't be done moving at closing time.

Probably not at this rate. These people are the worst. As much as it'll pain me I am secretly rooting for this to fall through. They would be so screwed and I think they deserve it. A lot of this could have been avoided if they simply were open during the process. I'm literally pushing back on everything they ask at this point. I was cool with the move push back because it saves my wife a vacation day. I however gave them some grief about it.

[Freezer-TPF-]

I'd also worry that they are going to leave the place a mess or do damage while moving. Do you have a final walkthrough right before closing?

(I'm glad the place we bought was unoccupied.)

[malchior]

I'd also worry that they are going to leave the place a mess or do damage while moving. Do you have a final walkthrough right before closing?

(I'm glad the place we bought was unoccupied.)

That is why I agreed to it in part. The walkthrough is late in the afternoon now before closing.

[Octavious]

Not sure where your town is at on this list, but rest assured you are probably ahead of CAMDEN in schooling. I decided today that we're walking from this hell hole. Don't care what it does to my credit anymore.

https://www.box.com/s/7c300516930c32f71a8e

Seriously my town is below some of the Abbott districts. I'm dumbfounded. And then today my mailman loses ANOTHER f'n package on me. We've complained numerous times about him and they said ya he's lazy. HOLY F'N CRAP!!!