I didn't want to post anything unless I had something positive to post. Because whining can be a downer. This has a little bit of good news and not so good news.
Since I moved from Chicago, I helped with the Lip Dub, the Film Festival (yet again!) and have been interning/assisting with a local corporate trainer. This has been all good, except no cash. But I feel like I am getting some good experience in working with people and my corporate trainer boss thinks I can go far. She says I could even be good at sales. Sales scares the crap out of me, but hey sometimes someone believing in you can make all the difference. So I am getting some confidence boosters.
Recently, I took on another project to help the National Writers Series (http://www.nationalwritersseries.org/2012-shows/
) get their events Live Captioned. I am very much the kind of person that wants to be able to attend events like this, but the one time I went, I couldn't understand anything the David Sardis said
. Fifty years ago I would have said, this is the way the world works, but no longer! I have been researching options and giving the board of NWS my information I have gathered on live so that they can make their decisions. They have everything I know, I just wonder how to get more involved, to actually talk to these people. I don't want to alienate them and be the "hardcore super crazy activist dude". I have my fingers crossed that this works! I also have a few fundraising ideas for them, but they are pro's and might already have better ideas in that realm.
The real problem is that some days are really great days, I am getting experience, my confidence grows and I feel like I can take on the world. No job, yet, but I am still at least trying to move forward. The next day.... I feel like a loser, no job, living with the parents (for now, I am working on getting out), and I feel like I am never going to get anywhere. I worked really hard on my communication skills and my studies in college, and now I can't seem to get paid. I graduated college with a 3.88 GPA, I graduated in the top 15 percent of my high-school class. Now I am in the bottom 96 percent for college aged people (only 4 percent unemployment for college graduates?) It feels exactly like this
I just want to feel like this effort isn't going to be a waste, like college so far seems to have been. I know its up to me... I just wanted to let y'all (especially the people in Chicago) know that I am at least trying. But like Yoda said, "do nor do not, there is no try." I am feeling my way to be more like that.