The Ted Cruz Train Wreck

YellowKing · Post by **YellowKing** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 9:19 am

How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.

Jaymann · Post by **Jaymann** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 9:32 am

I wanna know is Cruz eating Blake?

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 9:34 am

YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.

If it's true, this might be the one single scenario that actually increases his popularity. I mean, if these six women like him maybe he deserves another look?

Grifman · Post by **Grifman** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:10 am

If this is true, could the Republican campaign get any weirder?

Of course, he could just pull a Trump and brag about all his affairs. Worth a shot, right?

RunningMn9 · Post by **RunningMn9** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:22 am

YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.

Forget sleeping with him. How could that dude find six other people who could stand to be in close proximity to him for any reason?

coopasonic · Post by **coopasonic** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:26 am

RunningMn9 wrote:
YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.
Forget sleeping with him. How could that dude find six other people who could stand to be in close proximity to him for any reason?

He has money and power.

Grifman · Post by **Grifman** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:29 am

Three of the woman have tentatively been identified, and one of them is a Trump spokeswoman, Katrine Pierson (who used to work for Cruz from what I've read). Another is a former campaign manager for Carley Fiorina, whose campaign strangely received a $500k donation from a Ted Cruz super pac (assumption is pay off here). It just keeps getting weirder and weirder.

Jeff V · Post by **Jeff V** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:32 am

coopasonic wrote:
RunningMn9 wrote:
YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.
Forget sleeping with him. How could that dude find six other people who could stand to be in close proximity to him for any reason?
He has money and power.

Yes, it all follows in proper order.

First you get the money.
Then you get the power.
Thennnn you get the women.

RunningMn9 · Post by **RunningMn9** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:41 am

coopasonic wrote:He has money and power.

Even with money and power, he's one of the most hated people I've ever seen. And I don't mean fake, bullshit ideological "I hate that guy because he's a libural!!" hate. I mean like virtually *everyone* that meets this asshole in any real way cannot stand him.

El Guapo · Post by **El Guapo** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:09 pm

Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?

Pyperkub · Post by **Pyperkub** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:10 pm

El Guapo wrote:Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?

It looks like it.

Pyperkub · Post by **Pyperkub** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:12 pm

YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.

I think at least one of them is a call girl..

geezer · Post by **geezer** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:23 pm

El Guapo wrote:Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?

John Edwards and Tiger Woods probably think so. Plus a few other outlets (Washington times, Breitbart) have reporters that have tweeted confirmations sort of. Breitbarts guy us saying they had the story last month but buried it. Of course, it's Beritbart so who knows WTF is true there.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:40 pm

El Guapo wrote:Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?

That's unfair. It has the word "Enquirer" in its name, doesn't it?

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:44 pm

Above and beyond the fact that there might be five (or more) women interested in sexing the human blob fish known as Ted Cruz, if there's any truth to even a single instance how could he think it wouldn't come out? If he really has 5 mistresses is it pure arrogance or was he betting on the fact that no one would admit to it if this was discovered? It just seems like a giant gamble if he knew this was lurking in his disgusting closet.

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:44 pm

hepcat wrote:
El Guapo wrote:Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?
That's unfair. It has the word "Enquirer" in its name, doesn't it?

They're just asking questions.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:48 pm

Cruz should embrace the insanity that is the GOP candidacy run. Show up to debates in a smoking jacket and an ascot with a model on each arm. Tell everyone that Trump keeps texting him late at night asking for his advice on how to please a woman.

Holman · Post by **Holman** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:52 pm

This isn't right. Ted Cruz's public faults are so severe that it's absurd for him to be brought down by private ones.

Sepiche · Post by **Sepiche** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:54 pm

As much fun as it would be to see Cruz hoisted by his own petard, for this to come out now feels like an attempted hatchet job from the Trump campaign. I'll be more receptive when I see some confirmation from sources outside the tabloids and right wing press.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:57 pm

This is the key quote from earlier:

and one of them is a Trump spokeswoman, Katrine Pierson

In any case, I see very little chance of the GOP recovering from the debacle of this campaign. It's either going to have to do a 52 reboot and find a different version of Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman; or throw up its hands and just meld with the Libertarians late one night when no one is watching.

Moliere · Post by **Moliere** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:12 pm

El Guapo wrote:Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?

These guys say "Yes".

Defiant · Post by **Defiant** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:38 pm

So is this the train wreck?

gbasden · Post by **gbasden** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:51 pm

El Guapo wrote:Does the Enquirer report actually have credibility?

From what I've read, this is the same reporter that uncovered the Edwards affair.

Alefroth · Post by **Alefroth** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:11 pm

Holman wrote:This isn't right. Ted Cruz's public faults are so severe that it's absurd for him to be brought down by private ones.

That's how we roll in America.

Biyobi · Post by **Biyobi** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:15 pm

Smoove_B wrote:If he really has 5 mistresses is it pure arrogance or was he betting on the fact that no one would admit to it if this was discovered?

I think "pure arrogance" pretty much defines Cruz.

hepcat · Post by **hepcat** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:18 pm

Has it been established he had 5 mistresses concurrently? This may just be 5 mistresses over the course of his time in Washington. Which would then make him an underachiever.

GreenGoo · Post by **GreenGoo** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:33 pm

Defiant wrote:So is this the train wreck?

Lol. The little trickle of blood at the end seals it.

That's kind awful. Now I feel bad for laughing.

GreenGoo · Post by **GreenGoo** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:35 pm

RunningMn9 wrote:
YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.
Forget sleeping with him. How could that dude find six other people who could stand to be in close proximity to him for any reason?

Exactly. I can almost see women sleeping with trump because he's got money, but Cruz, except for this run at the Presidency, is no one. Well, not no one, but no one you'd sacrifice your self respect for, I wouldn't think.

Defiant · Post by **Defiant** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:52 pm

GreenGoo wrote:
Defiant wrote:So is this the train wreck?

Lol. The little trickle of blood at the end seals it.

That's kind awful. Now I feel bad for laughing.

Missed that.

Holman · Post by **Holman** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 3:18 pm

Somebody check in with Glenn Beck and find out how this fits God's plan for Ted Cruz to save the republic.

RunningMn9 · Post by **RunningMn9** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 3:27 pm

Smoove_B wrote:Above and beyond the fact that there might be five (or more) women interested in sexing the human blob fish known as Ted Cruz, if there's any truth to even a single instance how could he think it wouldn't come out? If he really has 5 mistresses is it pure arrogance or was he betting on the fact that no one would admit to it if this was discovered? It just seems like a giant gamble if he knew this was lurking in his disgusting closet.

This may be my favorite post that you've ever written. I can legitimately feel your disgust through your words.

Rip · Post by **Rip** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:00 pm

Smoove_B · Post by **Smoove_B** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:26 pm

Oh, we can do better than that.

Spoiler:

gilraen · Post by **gilraen** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:27 pm

Pyperkub · Post by **Pyperkub** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:33 pm

More fun with Ted Cruz:

One of Ted Cruz’s top national security advisers has convinced the National Rifle Association’s members to weigh in on whether or not they think one of their board members is a secret Muslim spy.

Yes, really.

The adviser, Frank Gaffney, aided by cheerleader-in-chief Glenn Beck, has spent more than a decade trying to convince Washington conservatives that anti-tax leader Grover Norquist is part of a secret Muslim Brotherhood plot to infiltrate the government and sow the seeds of jihad.

Not sure if this was part of the Gaffney discussion above or not...

Rip · Post by **Rip** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:37 pm

tgb · Post by **tgb** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:51 pm

RunningMn9 wrote:
YellowKing wrote:How could that dude find SIX women who wanted to sleep with him? The mind reels.
Forget sleeping with him. How could that dude find six other people who could stand to be in close proximity to him for any reason?

Women have always had a thing for Abbott & Costello.

Anonymous Bosch · Post by **Anonymous Bosch** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 8:33 pm

Cruz proclaims "Donald Trump may be a rat, but I have no desire to copulate with him":

Chicago Tribune wrote:Cruz blamed the story on Roger Stone, a longtime political adviser to Trump.

"It is a story that quoted one source on the record: Roger Stone, Donald Trump's chief political adviser," said Cruz. "It is attacking my family. And what is striking is Donald's henchman, Roger Stone, had for months been foreshadowing that this attack was coming. It's not surprising that Donald's tweet occurs the day before the attack comes out. And I would note that Mr. Stone is a man who has 50 years of dirty tricks behind him. He's a man for whom a term was coined for copulating with a rodent. Well, let me be clear: Donald Trump may be a rat, but I have no desire to copulate with him."

I honestly haven't the faintest notion of what he was shooting for with that particular comment, but even in this absurd election season, that has to rank among the most comical quotes yet.

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:33 pm

Anonymous Bosch wrote:Cruz proclaims "Donald Trump may be a rat, but I have no desire to copulate with him":

Chicago Tribune wrote:Cruz blamed the story on Roger Stone, a longtime political adviser to Trump.

"It is a story that quoted one source on the record: Roger Stone, Donald Trump's chief political adviser," said Cruz. "It is attacking my family. And what is striking is Donald's henchman, Roger Stone, had for months been foreshadowing that this attack was coming. It's not surprising that Donald's tweet occurs the day before the attack comes out. And I would note that Mr. Stone is a man who has 50 years of dirty tricks behind him. He's a man for whom a term was coined for copulating with a rodent. Well, let me be clear: Donald Trump may be a rat, but I have no desire to copulate with him."
I honestly haven't the faintest notion of what he was shooting for with that particular comment, but even in this absurd election season, that has to rank among the most comical quotes yet.

Roger Stone has a long and storied history as a vicious political operative, specializing in dirty tricks and sabotage. Ratfucking is slang for political dirty tricks. Maybe Cruz just meant that he's not going to get down in the muck (as he accuses Trump of doing), although he still couldn't resist calling Trump a rat.

Or maybe he's totally into rats, and therefore doth protest o'er much.

PLW · Post by **PLW** » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:53 pm