Hermit or Social Butterfly?

Coskesh · Post by **Coskesh** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 5:32 pm

I'm a hermit by nature, but when my friends drag me out of the house, I'm a 'social butterfly' I guess, since I'm the joker of the group.

I can get along with most people (since I don't feel the need to argue to make people see things my way) except for sarcastic intellectual types with a dry sense of humor/personality. I don't mind sarcasm, but if there is no emotion in the presentation, it doesn't work for me. I tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve, so if I'm having a good time, generally the people around me are too.

I do crave social interaction, so I guess that makes me a social butterfly tempered by self doubt.

Meghan · Post by **Meghan** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 6:25 pm

I'm a hermit mostly and mostly pretty happy with that. I never feel a *need* to get out and socialize.

With me, I'm comfortable during socialization but preparing for socializing triggers my mental demons. I'm ok with it if I get enough advance warning and I can put it in my calandar. If it's on the calander I can handle it. It's official. It's scheduled. Spontaneous stuff leaves me feeling overwhelmed.

I hate my mental demons though so sometimes I force meself to be spontaneous just to mess with their minds for a change.

Lee · Post by **Lee** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 6:43 pm

Damn Meal, are you that long winded in person?!

Good read.

The Meal · Post by **The Meal** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 6:48 pm

Lee wrote:Damn Meal, are you that long winded in person?!

Good read.

Hopefully you'll find out soon!

~Neal

Lee · Post by **Lee** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 7:01 pm

The Meal wrote:
Lee wrote:Damn Meal, are you that long winded in person?!

Good read.
Hopefully you'll find out soon!

~Neal

For the first OO CO get together!

bluefugue · Post by **bluefugue** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 7:13 pm

I am more of a hermit. I am extremely uncomfortable in social situations (like parties) where most of the acquaintances are casual or new. However, I somehow seem to have acquired quite a few friends, so my social life is moderately active.

Not sure why people like to hang around me, actually. Must be my scathing wit and smoldering good looks.

koanicriddle · Post by **koanicriddle** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 7:20 pm

Count me as another member of the hermit club, though I'm much more social now than at any other point in my life. I take a while to get to a point where I feel comfortable being my goofy self around people I don't know well, so I'm sure at times I come across as a bit aloof or somesuch.

khomotso · Post by **khomotso** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 9:36 pm

I love people - just one at a time.

Although I dare say I tend toward the hermit side of the spectrum, I'm just as likely to go off on a big outing on my own. It's not about being a shut-in, it's about being exhausted by those I don't feel really at ease with.

I "waste" a lot of money having my own place, without roommates. But God, what a beautiful thing it is. My money is rarely better spent.

My ideal form of interaction is with only one or two friends, going on a long trip together ... and then not seeing each other for months afterward. I'm going to Vietnam for three weeks next month with an old buddy, for example, and he lives in Alaska.

I think the underlying issue is that I'm fairly intense about my relationships. A little too anxious for intimacy, a little too eager to please, a little oversensitive. I know this and have learned to moderate my behavior, learned to keep a little perspective, but it takes work. And that work costs ... then Debbie Allen breaks in and bellows, "And right here's where you start payin'!"

Kraken · Post by **Kraken** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 10:12 pm

Meghan wrote:I'm ok with it if I get enough advance warning and I can put it in my calandar. If it's on the calander I can handle it. It's official. It's scheduled. Spontaneous stuff leaves me feeling overwhelmed.

I'm the same way. I tend to dread my scheduled social engagements as they loom ever nearer. Once they start, though, it's OK, and when they're over I'm often surprised to discover that I had a good time. I wish I were as good at enjoying the experience while it unfolds as I am at appreciating it afterwards.

RodeoRanch · Post by **RodeoRanch** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 10:24 pm

I like people. Just not when there's too many of them. I hate crowds.

I guess I'm a hermit.

baka_na_ichigo · Post by **baka_na_ichigo** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 10:36 pm

Friends are fun.

I'm more of a butterfly than hermit, but I must have some alone time lest I go nuts. I'm something of a mix of my parents, my dad being a wannabe butterfly with limited social skills and my mum being a wannabe hermit with too many people in her life and much better social skills. I got most of my mom's charm and most of my dad's love of socializing.

The Meal wrote:(completely read by a total of one person, I'd imagine)

I read the post all the way through! Hmm. Methinks I need to learn how to skim things.

KingB · Post by **KingB** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 10:59 pm

Giles Habibula wrote:Great topic!
There are a few people whose company I really enjoy. The problem is that those folks all live by VERY structured schedules. Thus, when they stop by to visit, it's usually 'on the way' to another appointment or get-together that begins at a certain time.

Nobody likes to just 'hang out' anymore.

I'd love to be able to drop by someone's house or have them drop by here and talk for hours on end or play a board game or something. But I guess that's not productive enough for them. Everything they do has to 'count' or be important or it's not worth doing.

I hear ya on that one. Don't worry Mark, when me and my hopefully soon to be wife move back to Bismarck I will stop by for hours on end...haha.

The Meal · Post by **The Meal** » Mon Oct 18, 2004 11:22 pm

baka_na_ichigo wrote:
The Meal wrote:(completely read by a total of one person, I'd imagine)
I read the post all the way through! Hmm. Methinks I need to learn how to skim things.

Yay! I can't believe you read it *and* actually admitted to it!

I'm a whole lot like a lot of people who've posted. I much prefer one-on-one interactions unless I'm 100% comfortable with the people involved. I also do better in *weird* group situations (where I'm not comfortable at all) if it's scheduled ahead of time and I can work my way up to it. I'm most definitely an introvert, it's just that I can hide that fact for short periods when forced. If I don't get enough time to myself to recharge the batteries, however, I get really irritable. I'm not generally a fun person to be around (I'm very selfish in my interactions with others) at best, but if I don't have time to work on whatever mental projects keep me from snapping, I can really be a piece of work.

~Neal

Zathras · Post by **Zathras** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 12:25 am

I guess that I'm with the majority here with my hermet-ish tendencies. I have a few close friends, and while I don't mind being out and social, if I'm alone it does not bother me in the least.

Who knows, perhaps I'm destined to be an old man in a hotel room with a hotplate. But for the moment, as long as I have a net connection, games and books I'm content.

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 8:28 am

If I don't get enough time to myself to recharge the batteries,

I've always called that down time, and I have made that clear to everyone I have ever dated at the beginning and they all thought I was crazy. Every day I need some sort "I am on a desert island time." Apon reflection, it makes me very glad that I was rejected from the military. The ex- in particular took a long time to adjust to this, but after several years, she found that she got accustomed to having her alone time and began to enjoy it as well. I don't know how people can live without. All people, all the time is just an excuse grab a gun and go to McDonald's on a Monday.

Spike · Post by **Spike** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 10:10 am

warning wrote:I see people professionally all day long. I have to be very interactive at work and I'm good at it. But when the day is done or on weekends I'd prefer to be at home with my wife, kids, dog and cats. I prefer the company of myself or my family to most people.

Remove wife, kids and dog. The rest matches me. Being alone is one of the few luxuries I require and cannot get enough of.

sissyc · Post by **sissyc** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 10:56 am

I am okay in small groups. I can't stand to go to the grocery store, mall, anywhere that would include a large crowd of people. On the occasion that I do go out and about, I don't make eye contact with anyone, I can't stand it when people bump into me, and I hate the small-talk that happens at the checkout! Please, just tell me how much I have to pay and don't talk to me because I'm sure you really DON'T want to know if I found everything!

I enjoy a small group of people (less than 6) talking about politics, religion, sex, whatever! I have very few people in my life that I feel that comfortable with and I like to keep it that way!

Although, once in a while I DO like to go to the strip club with friends and just get crazy!

Edit: Was that a little too much information?

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 11:25 am

Was that a little too much information?

Not for me. The problem with bringing women to strip clubs though, is that the girls seem so much more attracted to 1) the attention they get for giving attention to woment and 2) women in general. So if you are a guy there with the company of women and are actually there to enjoy the fantasy of the company of some hot underdressed stranger, then your SOL.

....Now that I think about it, I'm not sure where that too much information line.

Someone actually pushed me to not cross it the other day here, though. (something about the details of pleasure and pain combined)

sissyc · Post by **sissyc** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 12:35 pm

I love to watch men salivate over some hot underdressed woman. Maybe it is just a secret yearning that I could have the gumption to get up on stage and be that hot underdressed woman while men salivate over me and fantasize about me.

Edit: Oops, maybe a little too much information again! But we all know that I am an attention whore, right!?

LordMortis · Post by **LordMortis** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 12:56 pm

Hey. I love to salivate over some hot underdressed women. It was never really my thing before, but it is recently discovered passion in life. I'm not quite sure I feel about being watched salivating over some underdressed women. I imagine that would make me self conscious (there's some irony there for you, I guess), but I'll have to find out some time.

If the yearning was secret, then Ima gonna guess it's not so much so any more. Oh, and likely if you go to the clubs, there are salivating and fantasizing whehter you are on the stage underdressed or not. As a whole, our imaginations are pretty good when it comes to seeing women naked. That's just something we do.

Sigh...just talking about strip clubs makes me miss the Red Wings. Last year the Red Wings and naked women were my solace to get the through the toughest time of my life. Oh, and strippers really aren't amused when you politely ask them to scoot over during their routine, so you can watch the game. Who knew?

sissyc · Post by **sissyc** » Tue Oct 19, 2004 1:00 pm

LordMortis wrote:Hey. I love to salivate over some hot underdressed women. It was never really my thing before, but it is recently discovered passion in life. I'm not quite sure I feel about being watched salivating over some underdressed women. I imagine that would make me self conscious (there's some irony there for you, I guess), but I'll have to find out some time.

If the yearning was secret, then Ima gonna guess it's not so much so any more. Oh, and likely if you go to the clubs, there are salivating and fantasizing whehter you are on the stage underdressed or not. As a whole, our imaginations are pretty good when it comes to seeing women naked. That's just something we do.

Sigh...just talking about strip clubs makes me miss the Red Wings. Last year the Red Wings and naked women were my solace to get the through the toughest time of my life. Oh, and strippers really aren't amused when you politely ask them to scoot over during their routine, so you can watch the game. Who knew?

Yea, the yearning is no longer secret - it's just between you and me!

DeKonstruct · Post by **DeKonstruct** » Tue May 23, 2023 7:52 am

These days I am a total hermit, with the exception of my wife and father I don't talk to anyone socially (I try to avoid any and all conversation while out and about too).

This wasn't always the case though, and I went through a very drastic change in personality around 24/5 (2012/3)...

From the age of about 14 to 24 I was the epitome of a social butterfly, I was pretty much friends with everyone at school/uni. I would go from friend group to friend group depending on the day, and I could get along with literally anyone and everyone. I was an open book and shared almost everything about myself.

Then I hit my last year of my 2nd Uni and my best mate from my first uni (who was almost a brother to me...i don't really believe in the whole Soul mate thing, but he was as close to that as possible...we were almost identical personalities wise, would often finish/carry on each others sentences...were basically inseperable). He killed himself...

We had talked alot in the year leading up to that, talking about our depression (as I had it too)...when he killed himself I finally got the help I needed for the depression...it encouraged me to act...as I had obvious concerns about myself at that point.

But after that happened, my personality took a total 180...I started turning people down when they asked me to do stuff, because I just didn't want to...and eventually they stopped asking...which made me feel so much better. I didn't bother talking to anyone much, and when I finished Uni I didn't make any effort to keep in touch.

These days I am a total hermit, and it makes me feel great. I don't feel like I have to rely on anyone, I don't get incessantly bothered by people either wanting to do stuff or talk. I feel as good, if not better than I did when I was a Social Butterfly.

I don't know for certain if it was my best mates suicide that caused it, as I was starting to head this way myself before it happened, but it definitely exacerbated it. My Wife does worry about me, as I really don't have anyone else in my life...and it puts alot of pressure on her (which I understand, but not much I can do about).

I don't feel like being social again, but even if I did, I don't know how I would even go about fixing it anymore...I used to be interested in what other people have to say...these days I can usually feel myself getting bored of them within a few seconds lol

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Tue May 23, 2023 8:20 am

Yawn.

Sorry. You lost me.

Jaymann · Post by **Jaymann** » Tue May 23, 2023 10:13 am

I pored over every word. But retained none of it.

Blackhawk · Post by **Blackhawk** » Tue May 23, 2023 10:17 am

Unagi wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 8:20 am Yawn.

Sorry. You lost me.

If you were so disinterested, then why was it necessary to go out of your way to insult a stranger?

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Tue May 23, 2023 10:27 am

Is ChatGPT really a stranger to any of us nowadays?

Sudy · Post by **Sudy** » Tue May 23, 2023 1:11 pm

No, ChatGPT is not a stranger to us nowadays. As an AI language model developed by OpenAI, it has gained significant recognition and popularity. ChatGPT has been widely used in various online platforms and applications, making it a familiar presence for many internet users. Its ability to engage in conversations, provide information, and assist with various tasks has made it a go-to tool for individuals seeking interactive and helpful AI assistance. Additionally, the widespread media coverage and discussions surrounding ChatGPT have further contributed to its familiarity, making it a recognized and well-known entity in the digital landscape.

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Tue May 23, 2023 1:27 pm

I'm not sure what ChatGPT is. Could someone enlighten me?

Sudy · Post by **Sudy** » Tue May 23, 2023 1:31 pm

dbt1949 wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 1:27 pm I'm not sure what ChatGPT is. Could someone enlighten me?

Here's a response generated by ChatGPT:

ChatGPT is an artificial intelligence program designed to have conversations with people. It's like having a virtual friend that can understand and respond to what you say. You can type messages to ChatGPT, and it will use its knowledge and understanding of language to generate helpful and engaging responses. It can provide information, answer questions, and even engage in casual conversation. ChatGPT has been trained on a vast amount of text from the internet, which helps it understand a wide range of topics. It's a tool that aims to assist and provide information in a conversational manner, making it easier for people to interact with computers and get the information they need.

Kraken · Post by **Kraken** » Tue May 23, 2023 1:31 pm

dbt1949 wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 1:27 pm I'm not sure what ChatGPT is. Could someone enlighten me?

Uhh, see Sudy's post directly above yours.

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Tue May 23, 2023 4:13 pm

Blackhawk wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 10:17 am
Unagi wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 8:20 am Yawn.

Sorry. You lost me.

If you were so disinterested, then why was it necessary to go out of your way to insult a stranger?

Pretty sure that is a bot you are calling ‘a stranger’.

Also. If you had read the entire post the bot made you should see that I only mirrored the final sentiment that was delivered….

And in the event that it was actually a ‘stranger’ here that made their first post via a random post resurrection, I thought it was appropriately snarky.

I used to be interested in what other people have to say...these days I can usually feel myself getting bored of them within a few seconds lol

Please don’t constantly think I’m a dick.

dbt1949 · Post by **dbt1949** » Tue May 23, 2023 4:16 pm

Is it okay to do it part time?

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Tue May 23, 2023 4:18 pm

dbt1949 wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 4:16 pm Is it okay to do it part time?

Encouraged.

Anonymous Bosch · Post by **Anonymous Bosch** » Tue May 23, 2023 4:33 pm

dbt1949 wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 1:27 pm I'm not sure what ChatGPT is. Could someone enlighten me?

In essence, ChatGPT is an online large language model (LLM) artificial intelligence chatbot. You can ask it detailed questions and it answers accordingly, as illustrated below:

If you're curious and would like to give it a whirl, YouChat is an AI chatbot and search assistant that provides similar answers to that of ChatGPT without requiring you to sign up for an account.

gilraen · Post by **gilraen** » Tue May 23, 2023 4:37 pm

I barely even want to talk to real people half the time, why would I ever want to have a conversation with an AI...

I figured it was a very strange first post for anyone (with such a personal topic). Didn't even occur to me that it could be ChatGPT. I guess I should start getting used to that being the case.

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Tue May 23, 2023 4:51 pm

Unagi wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 4:13 pm And in the event that it was actually a ‘stranger’ here that made their first post via a random post resurrection, I thought it was appropriately snarky.

My policy is that if a human being acts in a manner indistinguishable from a bot, I'm not going to feel bad for reacting as if they are a bot.

If it turns out that I'm mistaken, well, that's why Canada invented the word "Sorry!"

Blackhawk · Post by **Blackhawk** » Tue May 23, 2023 5:37 pm

It's mine that I'd rather give a bot credit than unintentionally attack a real person. The bot won't care if I'm wrong. The human might.

Max Peck · Post by **Max Peck** » Tue May 23, 2023 6:39 pm

That's fair.

Kraken · Post by **Kraken** » Wed May 24, 2023 1:57 am

When's the last time we gained a bona fide new Overlord in EBG? It would be nice to not die out. I, for one, welcome my bot brethren.

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Wed May 24, 2023 6:52 am

Blackhawk wrote: ↑Tue May 23, 2023 5:37 pm It's mine that I'd rather give a bot credit than unintentionally attack a real person. The bot won't care if I'm wrong. The human might.

Again. This potential human just told us all how they can hardly be bothered to listen to anyone for more than a few second before the lose interest.

I replied to that ‘human’ that I lost interest after only a few seconds.

That ‘human’ would then be at a fork in the road.

Do they see the humor and irony in my reply? Do they hear their own statement echoed in my reply and reflect on it all. And then do they chuckle at me, and themselves, and strangers talking about themselves on the internet.

Or are they insulted by me, because like them, I declared that I got bored and lost interest in a few seconds - but unlike them, I should be held to a higher standard and respect what they had to share.

So, while I am pretty sure it’s a bot. I’m sincerely perfectly fine breaking the ice with Mr.DeKunconstuctor by way of that reply. And from what he posted, shouldn’t he only see me as a kindred spirit?

In fact, I will point out that I’m the only one to reply to their post, and I did so specifically to see if they would reply. To see if they were real or not.

Please don’t let me keep you guys welcoming this new poster with more ‘welcome’ replies, if you honestly feel that way.

No?

“attack” is a little heavy.

Octopus Overlords

Hermit or Social Butterfly?

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