[Gushing Parents] Tell me your cute kid stories

Bakhtosh · Post by **Bakhtosh** » Tue Dec 04, 2012 3:47 pm

Amelia 6.5 talking to Crush at Disney World: 1 minute

AWS260 · Post by **AWS260** » Tue Dec 04, 2012 5:53 pm

My 2.10 year old likes to narrate the Apollo 11 mission, often concluding with the following:

"And then Neil and Buzz and Michael go back to Earth, have a parade, go home, go to sleep, wake up and have a snack."

Mmm, snacks.

Paingod · Post by **Paingod** » Tue Dec 04, 2012 5:56 pm

My wife informed me yesterday that our Eldest accused me of calling him names. What did I call him? He replied in a hushed tone "A fan..."

Jag · Post by **Jag** » Tue Dec 04, 2012 6:52 pm

Bakhtosh wrote:Amelia 6.5 talking to Crush at Disney World: 1 minute

That is too cute. I love watching the little dudes interact with the Crush exhibit.

JSHAW · Post by **JSHAW** » Tue Dec 04, 2012 7:52 pm

Several weeks ago my wife and I wanted to watch a dvd we haven't watched in a long time. The pick was 1977 Star Wars.

Watching with us was our 4 year old daughter Jessie. She's never seen it. She's seen some commercials on tv for the related toys, lego's,
so she kinda knew about R2D2.

Today me and Jess were in the movie room. Right out of the blue she asks to watch Star Wars. First time she's ever asked
on her own to watch it. I have to say I was happy about her choice.

She talked about R2D2, I think she just's likes saying his name.

We get up to the point where Luke's got the droids in the shop cleaning them up and she asks if we can watch WALL-E.

Guess she was in a robot kinda mood today. During WALL-E she fell asleep for her afternoon nap.

For me this was the height of cuteness. She's never show alot of interest in Star Wars, and everytime I've asked her in the past
about WALL-E she always say's "NO, not that one!"

YellowKing · Post by **YellowKing** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 12:45 am

This past weekend we had an "incident."

My daughter and son were playing in the playroom. They seemed content so I stepped around the corner to do a couple of dishes. I finish up, walk back in the playroom, and my daughter (3) is standing there with a pair of scissors and large chunks of her hair all over the floor.

Sure enough she had whacked off a good 4-5 inches in three spots. It could have been worse, because somehow she managed to get the scissors up under the top layer so a lot of the damage was covered up. We had a long talk about why this was a no-no, and my wife and I had a long talk about who left scissors within reach of a toddler.

When all was said and done, however, we chalked it up to one of those stories we'd laugh about when she got older and didn't really fuss at her much.

My daughter, however, was *extremely* embarrassed about what she had done and spent the better part of the day moping around. She would cry at the drop of a hat and wanted to be held a lot. We wound up taking her to the hair salon to get it "fixed," and tried to keep her self-esteem up the rest of the day.

That night I was lying down with her for storytime and I hear her softly crying. I said, "Baby, what's wrong?" She replied, "Daddy, I'm just a little kid. I didn't know." It about broke my heart. I wound up spending the rest of her story time telling her about when daddy was a little kid and all the silly stuff I did while trying to learn about the world. By the time she went to bed we were both laughing. Sometimes those accidents that seem like part of a very bad day turn into memories you'll cherish forever.

silverjon · Post by **silverjon** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 1:26 am

My mom didn't get really mad at me for cutting my hair like that until the second time I did it.

KKBlue · Post by **KKBlue** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 1:48 am

YellowKing wrote:I wound up spending the rest of her story time telling her about when daddy was a little kid and all the silly stuff I did while trying to learn about the world. By the time she went to bed we were both laughing. Sometimes those accidents that seem like part of a very bad day turn into memories you'll cherish forever.

Thank you for taking the time with her and of course sharing the story with us. You are a good daddy to realize she doesn't have the words to explain what happened and how she feels YET she did it perfectly for you to understand and be a friend... like all daddy's should be

+1 for the future of the world!

Vorret · Post by **Vorret** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 7:03 am

When I was 20-21 I was about to go out clubbing and thought my hair looked a bit too long.
I did what any sane (?) person would do and fixed it.

A few days later I went to the hair dresser to finish the job and the first thing the girl tells me is:

"Did you try to cut your own hair?"
"Yea..."
"Never do it again"

LawBeefaroni · Post by **LawBeefaroni** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:23 am

Fortunately (and unfortunately) we live above a salon and Tiks is on a first-name basis with all the stylists. She won't let anyone else, including herself, cut her hair.

They went down there this past weekend for a cut and a manicure and there was a kid's tutu trunk show (?). Wife swears she didn't know it was going on. Tiks was dressed and modelling within minutes:

Then it was time for a manicure:

Thankfully I was off doing a baseball card charity event so my mancard lives another week. My plan to raise a tomboy is in jeopardy though.

Captain Caveman · Post by **Captain Caveman** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 4:06 pm

SUGAR (do do do do... do do). Ohh...

Bakhtosh · Post by **Bakhtosh** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 5:15 pm

Jag wrote:
Bakhtosh wrote:Amelia 6.5 talking to Crush at Disney World: 1 minute
That is too cute. I love watching the little dudes interact with the Crush exhibit.

That whole 10 minutes was awesome, but didn't want to post it all. There was this one boy who introduced himself as "Umm Nick", and that's what he was the whole time.
One kid said he flew there and Crush looked shocked and said, "you can fly?"

Octavious · Post by **Octavious** » Wed Dec 05, 2012 5:28 pm

My daughter who was 18 months at the time was terrified of Crush. I had to take her out the side door because she was screaming her head off.

LawBeefaroni · Post by **LawBeefaroni** » Fri Dec 07, 2012 1:14 pm

This isn't exactly a kid story but the kid was listening to some music on the squeezebox yesterday and I checked the playlist. Now I have never even thought twice about "Ride a Cock Horse to Banbury Cross." It's just a classic nursery rhyme.

Well some censorship algorithm has totally ruined it for me now. Attempting to censor it actually makes it look dirty:

Jag · Post by **Jag** » Fri Dec 07, 2012 2:17 pm

That's awesome

Skinypupy · Post by **Skinypupy** » Sat Dec 29, 2012 11:12 am

Me: Brynlee, you really need to quit whining.
Bryn (very serious): Dad, I'll stop whining when you stop grumping.

Well played kid.

Exodor · Post by **Exodor** » Sat Dec 29, 2012 11:26 am

My feisty red-headed daughter and I were discussing something in the car the other day.

She ended the discussion by saying "You know nothing, daddy"

Apparently I'm raising my very own Ygritte.

DD* · Post by DD* » Sun Dec 30, 2012 12:21 am

Not sure this qualifies, but it does sum up my soon-to-be 11 year old daughter... Christmas Eve, there was drop-in hockey at our home rink. About half of my daughter's team showed up, and the coaches (ie, the Dads) broke the teams up so as to have a good mix of kids. Needless to say, this led to teammates facing off with each other... One of the kids on my daughters team ("Jason") kept crosschecking my daughter Morgan. Mo put up with it for a few minutes, then proceeded to grab Jason's stick with one hand and toss him into next week. All we saw was skates in the air and Jason on his butt.

Daddy's girl don't take no shit!

YellowKing · Post by **YellowKing** » Sun Dec 30, 2012 12:35 pm

I have tried to expose my daughter (3) to all kinds of music - we pretty much skipped the nursery rhyme kid crap and listened to The Beatles, Jack Johnson, etc.

So we get in the car the other day and I'm flipping through stations. Bob Marley was on.

"Do you like this?"
YP: "No."
(Turn it to 90s music)
"Do you like this?"
YP: "No."

We proceed to go through ten different stations and genres. She doesn't like any of them.

Finally I turn it to the hits station and they are blasting One Direction.

YP: "YES! I LIKE THIS MUSIC DADDY!"

Are they just born with a boy band gene? Truly I have failed as a father. (Though to be fair I suppose The Beatles started out as a teeny bopper boy band).

Skinypupy · Post by **Skinypupy** » Sun Dec 30, 2012 5:17 pm

I don't play most of my metal for Little B, but she always hears a bit when I plug in my iPhone in the car...usually 20-30 seconds before I can navigate to something more kid-appropriate. I will play her the occasional song, but only if it's more folk-metal oriented and only if there aren't any lyrics in English. For example, she absolutely loves "Under Bergens Rot" by Finntroll.

Now every time we get in the car, B asks for "monster music"...which irritates Mrs. Skinypupy to no end.

Unagi · Post by **Unagi** » Thu Jan 03, 2013 5:21 pm

I decided to share Black & White 2 (the PC game) with my kid the other day... He's a young reader - and he is very confident in his skills - to the point where he will sometimes just 'read' the first part of a long word and sorta assume or even make up what the ending of it is.

Anyhow - I left him alone with the game for a little while, and when I came back he had discovered how to build the altar, and assign people to it (earning him the mana to cast spells).

I loved the word he invented, and we are now using it around the house wherever we can... (sadly, hasn't happened yet)

"Dad, look, I've got five worshy-whoppers!"

that's worshippers

Trent Steel · Post by **Trent Steel** » Thu Jan 03, 2013 5:43 pm

Sometimes after parking in my driveway, my 7 year old daughter wants to race me to the front door. I usually don't run after her because I'm carrying all sorts of things out of the car. One time I decided to surprise her when she wanted to race and sprinted past her to the front door. When she got there we had this exchange:

Her: Daddy, how did you do that?
Me: Well, I'm bigger and stronger and I have longer legs than you.
Her: But you're old.
Me: ... Just get inside the house.

YellowKing · Post by **YellowKing** » Fri Jan 04, 2013 3:25 pm

So I've mentioned my daughter's Beatle obsession. We got into a weird conversation the other night as I was putting her to bed.

YP: "Daddy? Can we go see The Beatles?"
Me: "No baby, they are not together anymore."
YP: "Why?"
Me: "Well two of them died."
YP: "Why, they wanted to see the fish?"
Me: ...... "What?"
YP: "That is why they dived - they wanted to see the fish. I want to be a sea diver when I get big."
Me: "No no, they DIED. Not DIVED."
YP: "How did they die?"
Me: "Errr....well a bad man shot John Lennon and George Harrison died because he got really sick."
YP: "A BAD MAN SHOT HIM????"
Me: "Yeah, a long time ago a bad man shot him and he died."
YP: "WHY?"
Me: "I don't know baby he was crazy."
YP: "JOHN LENNON WAS CRAZY?"
Me: "No...I mean the bad guy was crazy."
YP: "AND HE SHOT GEORGE HARRISON TOO?"
Me: "No no no let's start over. The bad guy shot John Lennon, and then many years later George Harrison got sick and died."
YP: "He was coughing?"
Me: "Errr yeah I suppose he was probably coughing."
YP: "But he's better now?"
Me: "No, he's not better because he died. Once you die you don't get better."
YP: "But when you die you go live with God and God makes you better."
Me: "Errr yeah OK well he's not sick anymore but he still can't come back and play music."
YP: "Are the other two Beatles going to be OK?"
Me: "Yes baby they are fine, they still make music and go on tour and everything."
YP: "Can we go see them?"
Me: "Well they don't usually tour together but yes we can go see Paul McCartney if he plays near us again."
YP: "I want to go see Ringo Starr. Ringo Starr is my favorite."
Me: "Err yeah we'll go see Paul McCartney.

LawBeefaroni · Post by **LawBeefaroni** » Fri Jan 04, 2013 3:38 pm

Yesterday Tiks was in this area between the end of the couch and the wall. We keep her large foam building blocks there and she's made it here sitting area.

So she is standing there with her back to us and I say, "Come on over and sit down, we're having dinner."
She says, "No!"
"Why not?"
"I suck!"
"What?"
"I suck, I not coming."
"Where did you hear that? You suck?"
"Yes, I suck!"
The wife, aghast, "Honey, you do not suck."
"I suck, I not coming over! Help!"
"Honey, how can we help? What's wrong?"
"My foot is suck! Suck on block!"
Both of us, relieved, "Oh, you're STUCK!"
Looking at us over her shoulder like we're the two dumbest people on Earth, "YES, I S[T]UCK HERE!"

coopasonic · Post by **coopasonic** » Fri Jan 04, 2013 3:52 pm

LawBeefaroni wrote:Yesterday Tiks was in this area between the end of the couch and the wall. We keep her large foam building blocks there and she's made it here sitting area.

So she is standing there with her back to us and I say, "Come on over and sit down, we're having dinner."
She says, "No!"
"Why not?"
"I suck!"
"What?"
"I suck, I not coming."
"Where did you hear that? You suck?"
"Yes, I suck!"
The wife, aghast, "Honey, you do not suck."
"I suck, I not coming over! Help!"
"Honey, how can we help? What's wrong?"
"My foot is suck! Suck on block!"
Both of us, relieved, "Oh, you're STUCK!"
Looking at us over her shoulder like we're the two dumbest people on Earth, "YES, I S[T]UCK HERE!"

This made me laugh because I saw it coming and with a 3 year old it's a regular sort of routine. The number of times my wife and I just look at each with a puzzled look whenever he says something is pretty scary. Sometimes he speaks so well, sounding more like his 6 year old brother, but other times we'll be damned if we can figure out what he's trying to say. He has a huge vocabulary, but sadly only knows the proper usage for about two thirds of the words.

Jag · Post by **Jag** » Fri Jan 04, 2013 4:19 pm

YellowKing wrote:So I've mentioned my daughter's Beatle obsession. We got into a weird conversation the other night as I was putting her to bed.

My younger son had a Beatles obsession and we were able to see Rain live twice. Was a pretty fun experience, especially since the whole place is full of fans, young and old. They are currently on Broadway but also tour the entire country during the year. Well worth taking the kids.

stessier · Post by **stessier** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 11:24 am

My wife was in my 6 year old daughter's room helping her get ready for bed while I was getting my 3 year old daughter in her PJs. My 6 year old talked back and my wife raised her voice and said "IS THAT HOW YOU TALK TO ME?"

My 3 year old looked at me solemnly and, shaking her head, said "that is not how you talk to her."

silverjon · Post by **silverjon** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 12:41 pm

My cousin M is almost 17 and she's a boxer. Over Christmas, family was teasing her a bit over a new boyfriend. Last week, we're all out for dinner together and while M is in the bathroom, Grandma quickly tells me about how the boyfriend touched M objectionably, so M bloodied his nose and he ran crying to his mother. "And that's why she's not seeing him anymore."

I'm so proud.

Crabbs · Post by **Crabbs** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:23 pm

Amelia (just over 2yrs old) is fully testing her limits. The other day she was trying to step on one of the cats' tails.

Me: "Amelia! You know better. We don't step on the cat's tail."

Amelia looks at me and proceeds toward the cat's tail once again.

Me: "Amelia! Do you want a time out?"

Amelia: "Yes!"

Sigh....

30 seconds into her 2 minute timeout it's not so much fun anymore.

Amelia: "Daddy, Get up?"

Me: "No, wait for the timer."

Sobbing ensues, but she sat in the chair for another 1:30

She hasn't volunteered for another timeout since.

coopasonic · Post by **coopasonic** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:29 pm

My 3 year old always says yes to a time out, then screams for 3 minutes. The first one was so easy in retrospect.

Octavious · Post by **Octavious** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:32 pm

My daughter gave her stuffed animal a timeout the one time.

stessier · Post by **stessier** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 3:03 pm

Posting this for Bill Harris at DubiousQualitybecause he's a former member and I think it fits.

Eli 11.5 has a project at school that is team-based, and it uses Photoshop. His team is behind schedule, and he's unhappy with some of the other team members. Here's what he told Gloria last night: "I mean, I like pasting dog's heads on cats, too, but there's a time and a place for that."

They grow up so fast.

coopasonic · Post by **coopasonic** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 3:03 pm

silverjon wrote:My cousin M is almost 17 and she's a boxer. Over Christmas, family was teasing her a bit over a new boyfriend. Last week, we're all out for dinner together and while M is in the bathroom, Grandma quickly tells me about how the boyfriend touched M objectionably, so M bloodied his nose and he ran crying to his mother. "And that's why she's not seeing him anymore."

I'm so proud.

You know you are old when a 17 year old is the source of a "cute kid story".

silverjon · Post by **silverjon** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 3:22 pm

coopasonic wrote:
silverjon wrote:My cousin M is almost 17 and she's a boxer. Over Christmas, family was teasing her a bit over a new boyfriend. Last week, we're all out for dinner together and while M is in the bathroom, Grandma quickly tells me about how the boyfriend touched M objectionably, so M bloodied his nose and he ran crying to his mother. "And that's why she's not seeing him anymore."

I'm so proud.
You know you are old when a 17 year old is the source of a "cute kid story".

I gots no kids of my own, so she's currently my youngest.

YellowKing · Post by **YellowKing** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 4:04 pm

Got this little gem the other day:

YP: "Daddy?"
YK: "Yes honey?"
YP: "Does God have boobs?"

El Guapo · Post by **El Guapo** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 4:11 pm

"YK: And how, son."

The real question: could God make her boobs so big that even God's own bra could not contain them?

Isgrimnur · Post by **Isgrimnur** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 4:21 pm

El Guapo wrote:"YK: And how, son."

The real question: could God make her boobs so big that even God's own bra could not contain them?

Psst. YP is YellowPrincess

El Guapo · Post by **El Guapo** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 4:28 pm

Oh, right, I knew that.

YellowKing · Post by **YellowKing** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 5:24 pm

I'm going to have to come up with some creative initials when YellowPrince learns to talk.

PLW · Post by **PLW** » Fri Jan 11, 2013 5:36 pm